Shiny No Longer

You once held so much appeal to me

but you are no longer new

the shininess has vanished

My interest slipped away

Broken

I feel for you, I really do

but you must understand 

look from my point of view

Life is short and death is around the corner

So I must keep moving

can not hold on to something broken

Don't cry

Please,wipe your tears

I love you

You know

So just turn that frown upside down

It's not like you are about to drown

Now, see you are sparkling right now

Oh look at the time, I must go

Fret not I shall be back, I can promise you that

Just work on that smile some more

Maybe you are not broken after all

Dry those tear,clean your face

Look, good as new

I must leave now,bye 

Door slams shut and crushes a pleading heart

Reviews

[Raven Starhawk]

I know when you are in a relationship with someone or believe you are in a relationship...lines often get blurred, stepped on and even torn apart. Sometimes leaving is the best resolution. At the time it may not seem that way for the other person but...I am not sure if this is what the poem is about but anyway it was well penned.

[V.J.C.]

Actually, I started this poem while thinking of a child and a toy. The child growing up and leaving......From there the poem transformed into what it is now.
I find that many things can be compared in ways. thanks for the review.

[Raven Starhawk]

^^* I now see that. And now it all really makes perfect sense. I have to say BRAVO!

[afra]

awww i feel the same way ...BTW great write

[Kaylor Mason]

Hmmm . . . read as a child with a toy, it makes much, much more sense. It's a lot more profound, too. Makes you feel the broken heart of a toy that's just lost its usefulness, and he's been thrown in the back of the closet, forgotten and alone. I've never been a toy, but I do know that feeling . . . it cuts like a knife with a blade dipped in acid, promising a slow, lingering death of a broken heart.

[Quill~]

Sad, but beautifully written. I enjoyed reading this. Well done.

[MOON]

Glad you explained it and really a metaphor for life we tire of things move on. Sad but true. Very good write.

[Earthy Mumma Soul]

Loved this poem , just not sure about the ending ... but apart from that , it was Brilliant :)

[writing mojo]

such beauty in harsh reality, pleading heart is a nice image... good stuff

[Brittany]

I -really- liked the perspective here. Most often its from the perspective of the person or thing being left, but here we have the opposite. Kudos for originality. I really thought it was well done with word choices and flow. Nice job. I liked it.

[Dove]

hmm. This is very good and entertaining. You are a very talented writer, never forget that:) I cant wait to read more of your writing. Fantastic job on this!