Obvious Yet Overlooked-By: Akeen V.

Unstoppable tomorrow arrives as today leaves.

Glorious sunshine rises as grayish light disperses.

Stars quietly flicker out, similar to candles caught in a breeze.

 

Seconds pass casually without recognition like a passing fly.

Time’s notion quickly falls irrelevant as soon as it begins.

 

Sins turns into normalness once they have been committed,

Intuiting many regret filled tears when sinners cry.

 

While in today’s devalued principles and greed filled eyes

Nothing amounts to nothing, which is implausible,

Everything is something despite its lack of importance.

 

Nothing can ever equal nothing, for nothing does not exist.

Yet our egotistical human race persists to dismiss

That all living or nonliving things are reliable

And solely accountable for the survival of our comforted

Society, where meaningful actions, transformations

Alongside earth's continuation is easily dispersed and thwarted.

 

Therefore ambitious materialism, grows ever more distorted,

Ensuring money will always be upheld to godly proportions.

Creating a massive absence for noticing earth and life’s

Most beautiful nothings that strive to halt grief’s

Worrisome hands from interacting with the devils keys

Which could unlock dooms catastrophic doors, with simple ease.

Reviews

[J.]

I really like this. Very well expressed, with great protest. Sadly true, we as human and The People of our various countries, are stuck amidst the muck and slime our leaders throw at us. And yet, we still seem to forget what is actually really important-taking things for granted, all that is in it's simplest form. Great work Akeen! And welcome to WC!

[Tomi]

I appreciate this, not necessarily the whole verse, more the individual lines on their own... my best "Stars quietly flicker out, similar to candles caught in a breeze"

[Helen Woodward]

Why haven't I read your work before? (I will remedy that!) I am amazed at your word placement and phrasing. What a benevolent and beautiful piece of work this is, it transported me to wonderful and sinister places all at once...KUDOS!!
My favorite line...
'Everything is something despite its lack of importance.'

Cheers~

Helen~

[Dream Weaver]

Very descriptive, sort of Zen like. Strong substance
and truths in the world we live in...Nicely done..

[Bubo]

I finally got here......and so glad I did, what a stunning piece showing the gruesome society we live in today, this piece brings wisdom and depth.Both of which I love.

Creating a massive absence for noticing earth and life’s
Most beautiful nothings that strive to halt grief’s
Worrisome hands from interacting with the devils keys
Which could unlock dooms catastrophic doors, with simple ease.

[the in between]

This was so powerful! first it was simple with ease and ended with such force :) i enjoyed it very much. Keep writing of course you have a way with words and ideas. I especially liked this lines:
sins turn into normalness once they been committed,
Intuiting many sin-filled tears when sinners cry.

[trainwreck]

I like this. Its very passionate without sounding angry.
I don't know how you'll take it, but in my head it sounded like a rap. Personally, I liked it that way as well. Good read. I'll review more of your works later.

[Emily Quinn]

A great message Akeen, one I believe in completely. It's very true how we worship money and useless material objects. We focus everything around little insignificant things while we should be putting all that time and energy into developing our society in a possitive way and make the world a better place to love in.

I noticed an error here; "...they been committed" it should be 'they've'
also "Alongside earths continuation" it should be Earth.
Earth= the planet, earth= the soil

Great poem with interesting analogies. I like!

[Madame Mystique]

Our existence has been depended on the hourglass and it's sand grains, great poem :)

[Marie Harrison]

Love this poem and it's message. The only thing is that it might need to be broken up a little to improve the flow to me. But, I love the poem. Great job!