Rhyme?

Restoring an old poem - Its just an honest attempt to rhyme.. and time..., well as u can see, not very successful hahahaha. Written just for funs' sake, since i was bored. Dont read too deep into the lines..

Rhyme?


Oh! Why can't I rhyme? Is it such a crime?
To try and put a line, and try and make it chime
O! Break this head of mine, to post crap online.
If only I could define, then I will these words, refine.

I am just a vine, not yet a summer wine.
I reason, never rhyme. Without riddles, I am fine.
My words just never time, explode in my face, a mine.
My words are like rime, not worth a single dime.

A bald head will shine, thats not so feminine.
If I pen to Rhyme, is it Masculine?
To relax and recline, under a big Pine.
My thought are like brine, on them, I truly dine.

Will this be sublime, Much like the sunshine.
Or will it just decline, and simply become slime.
mellifluously thine, superfluously mine,
Sour like lime, I just cant rhyme.

Author's Note

an old poem being restored.

Reviews

[Jim Roberson]

I can't not rhyme. Everything I write rhymes. I almost failed my creative writing class bacause the teacher wanted everyone to branch out in what we write and I couldn't do anything but rhyme. haha But, anyway, this is good. Its comical and junk. Good job and stuff!

[1809 Black Plague Decem..]

he he, you just did,
depends on the piece wheter to rhyme or not
it comes from the inner part of you
you instinctly know it
great work! ---mishel :P

[Randall Richard]

it was kind of funny in parts, but yeah, you shouldn't rhyme

[O!]

Hey AL....it aint crap!!.......i think ur RHYME is SUBLIME!!!

i love...to try and put a line and try and make it chime!! :-)

:-)

[Ruby Moon]

hehe...good job...
better then my tries...
my tries just repeat the words.
BLAH!!!
good try

[Welcome, To My Fairy Ta..]

this is sooo cute! the last line is my favorite. kiwi...lime...yeah

~Maiya~

[Bubo]

Great stuff!!
We all sit there searching for the perfect rhyming word!
I've given up now as it hurts my head and my writing!
But I love the way you have actually done it in fun and its worked!!!!!

Will this be sublime, Much like the sunshine.
Or will it just decline, and simply become slime.
mellifluously thine, superfluously mine,
Sour like lime, I just cant rhyme.

[Scherzo]

Wat a perfet time to whine and read thine Rhyme!

Good one Al!
:)