Relished Release

How does one begin to covet?

By coveting what we see

And don't your eyes seek out the things you want?

The things you think you need?

And your fears? Do they affect your needs?

I fear grasping for air, I cannot catch what I want taken away.
Regret

My life, this shell, the balance between mortal and immortal?

A fake smile, a facade, a quick nod. Who really paid attention to the needs of, my needs, without heeding their own first?

I fear thirst. That benefactor of quinch, still torn and bent, but I tried.. To end, but I didn't, I pretend.

Every day I pretend.
I watch my life unfold and think I am in control. I feel indifferent, I tell myself that all is null, then I feel guilt.
I feel void.

I feel bad,
because others have it worse but in my head, yes in my head, I live with a curse, to be free, but me, I still pretend.

I am learning that it's okay to feel hurt and pain and it's okay to be sad. The heart feels what it needs too.

And the mind can only mend so much, our bodies require touch and caresses from the sun much like a tree needs kisses from the sun to grow straight.

But when it leans, we weep not for the tree and accept it as it is, it grows this way because of need. But not humans, we are too consumed with greed.

Take this robe off the world. I need to see the universe unclothed.

It's okay to laugh and smile again.
The memories never go away until I forget.
Don't forget.

It's okay they talk, they don't know and I have nothing to prove.

I have become what I am because I didn't stop.

One day the sun will shine on my face, I will feel the warmth and it will feel good.

I will close my eyes and lean back.

I will immerse myself in,
That warmth,
That moment when I have a slither of peace,
That moment when I can breath with no constriction, with no grief.

And then I will covet no more,
I will relish in release.