LIFE CHANGES!

Brevity Poem : major life event turns the tides

Despair tips the ocean tide

euphoria moves the dulcet

bubbly ripples on the beach

a momentous life shake-up

ebbs and flows with the mind

to entrench

in a deep sandcastle of cloud nine

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i take this as a battle to stay upright as we are all knocked down by this change of life, by an unexpected wave that hit so hard and so high...and ravaged our beach and ripped apart our sandcastle.
Maybe one not built strongly enough in the first place...so can we rebuild it stronger?
I guess we shall see.
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

As always Jacob, a fine, in-depth review, thank you!

[barleygirl]

Frankly, this doesn't seem THAT brief! To me, a brevity poem is more like haiku with seventeen syllables. But I don't like 'em that short as I'm usually hungry for more after only 3 lines. This is the right amount of brevity to prod yourself into saying as much as possible in just a few words, yet also there's not the sense that there's still so much unsaid. I'm reminded of how, when we stand on wet sand at the edge of gentle sea-lapping, the sand is undermined from beneath our feet . . . interesting juxtaposition for your cloud-nine moment! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Betty Hermelee]

It was a moment of a life shakeup, but after much contemplation, the turnout was a success! Always appreciate you comments Margie, Hugs to you too!

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Betty... you will always feel passion as the ebb and flow of life is always present. The music of the Ocean lives in your soul. truly, Pat

[Betty Hermelee]

Yes indeed, life itself ebbs and flows, like the ocean, sometimes calm, sometimes angry! Thanks for reading dear Pat.

[Phill Oz O'fee]

I truly believe it is life's challenges that can make one stronger; when you have others to support you! Loved the wordplay and poignancy of the write... Bless … stay safe and well ... :-)

[Betty Hermelee]

Thank you Phil for your kind review, and nice to meet you at the Cafe!

[alanwgraham]

Hi Betty. Your perfectly formed wee poem could come from our collective misadventure or one of our personal life changers. I suppose for our C event we're all in it together and coping or not coping in our own ways. I'm glad I'm not only own with this and with someone I get on with. I think the writing helps a lot. I fear there may be a way to go with this and we may all need the cloud nine.
I'll wave from my cloud ten.
Take care.
Alan

[Betty Hermelee]

spot on Alan! It was indeed a personal life change; however one could see a collective in it too, especially since we are all in this mess together!!!
Thanks again for a fine review Alan. Findly, Betty

[Chris Shaw]

How powerful those waves can be. Can knock you off your feet with ease at a moments notice. A nice piece of brevity and visual with it Betty.

Chris

[Betty Hermelee]

You are absolutely correct about the powerful waves, which can knock you down in many ways; but the soft ripples can calm you as well, make you feel uplifted again. Thanks Chris, Fondly, Betty

[Fabian G. Franklin]

The ocean tries to swallow the shore but the moon never lets her stay. / He promises dreams of gold and more but the sandcastles draw her away.

[Betty Hermelee]

Nice review Fabian, so appreciate it!

[Lea Sheryn]

Like the sea, life changes with each passing moment.

[Betty Hermelee]

Thanks Lea, glad you liked it!

[Lea Sheryn]

You're welcome