If anyone hurts her!

No one messes with my babygirl and gets away with it.

Oh you have done it now!

You hurt my babygirl,

You stupid little cow! 

Now, you will pay for it. 

You hurt my babygirl,

Now your gona pay.

You have unleashed the wrath of a loving boyfriend.

So everyone else better stay out of the damn way.

There is no where you can hide,

I will never stop looking.

You have no one to stop me,

I will tear through anything you put in my way.

I will tear out your throat,

If that is what my rage desires.

I have not found a punishment good enough.

You will die a horrible death.

There is no sink or swim,

No fight or flight,

You have no idea what I am capable of.

You WILL pay the price.

You hurt my babygirl.

The only one who can stop me is her.

And even that is a slim possibility.

You WILL get what you deserve.

You can run.

Run run run.

You won't get far

Author's Note

Some one hurt the love of my life. It makes me so mad every time I think of anyone hurting her. Started out as a poem, then became my dark, rage fantasy

Reviews

[helen.cornett]

Very dark, but simply AMAZING in my opinion!

[Boy of the red]

Much appreciated :)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Rage fantasy...I like that. There is certainly emotion in these words. I enjoy the idea of this one, as well; having a man stand up for his "woman" in such a way. Feeling and concern are the cornerstones of love. A little editing to be done, but I'm sure you know that already. Still, I like the thought behind this one.

[Boy of the red]

Thank you. Haha but she is not my woman. She is my love. I would do the same for anyone I love. Friends as well. Editing to be done indeed.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Well, I believe we can "love" many people at the same time. To love is to offer in the strictest sense, every part of ourselves.

[Boy of the red]

Indeed

[LittleMissSunshine :)]

Oh you have done it now!
You hurt my babygirl,
You stupid little cow!

You have great ideas, and a great mind, I can tell from some of the lines in this piece, yet this stanza was not a great way to start off this piece. The wording is immature, and not very appealing to me personally, it made me kind of think that this piece was written by someone who just pounded out a piece, and used the word cow so he could get through the stanza, does that make sense? I have the same thoughts about the word "baby girl". It shows how young you truely are.

[Boy of the red]

Haha well I am 16. Babygirl and baby girl have two different meanings. One day ill have a baby girl but babygirl is my sweet name for my girlfriend. I wrote this in about 5 minutes to try to keep my anger in.thank you for the advice!

[LittleMissSunshine :)]

No problem, and I understand. I apologize for the lengthy comment.
One last tip, before you publish a piece, just go and read through it with the mindset of revising it a little bit. Sometimes, just switiching a word out can entirely change a piece.

[Boy of the red]

Haha I usually just edit them. It helps to post right away. Writing is therapeutic for me. And people usually tell how fresh it is. I can tell when people do the same and respect them for it. I do plan to go back and edit my works but true emotion can't be thought out. So I do as little as needed. Logic and emotion can never relate. They are always at war.

[InsanityWriter]

Your girlfriend is lucky to have a guy like you who cares so strongly for her! Great, passionate poem.

[Boy of the red]

Haha thank you. I am the luckey one though :)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

I admire how a good boyfriend you are to your girl. Always keep the love!

[Boy of the red]

thank you. i awlays will

[ForeverNever]

This shows what a caring, protective guy you are:]
I love it, as usual, your talent always leaves me speechless.
It's a beautiful piece

[Boy of the red]

Thank you my love

[ℰmerald ⚓]

in a disturbing, bloody way it shows you would do anything to keep your girl safe, sweet. good...emotional? piece :)

[Boy of the red]

Haha thank you. I would do anything for her.

[ℰmerald ⚓]

that's good :)

[RachelReaper]

in a violent, bloody, morbid way this was kind of adorable that you'd go to such lengths. ha, I feel sorry for whoever did this to your girlfriend, they should start on there bucket list right now.

[Boy of the red]

Haha I'm usually a very logical person but hurting my friends or my girlfriend....it's like I'm a whole different person