Not Unlikely

An interpretive battle with myself.

It's not unlikely that I'd die,


For your soul I've tried,


Losing wind, I curse myself,


Wishing to bind my inner heart,


Something made me feel, far,


Far, far, away from the light,

Where my soul separates,

Leaving me behind.

I'm a disgusting husk, at dusk,

A rapture of inner feelings,

The feeling that seeing is believing.


Don't fight me, I'm not going to lie,

I feel so far gone, down, on the ground,

Trust was lost when I cried,

Today, my spirit will die,

Flesh on fire, desire latent.

Author's Note

I want you to decide what this all means.

Reviews

[Sir Aphid]

Sounds like a spiritual battle. Fighting against something in yourself that you don't like. I can relate to it, if I'm actually interpreting it right.

When you continually do things that you don't want to do out of compulsion, it can feel like you're a husk or an automaton. Willpower is something that is cultivated. Dark entities are working against us. Sometimes we need the help of other entities.

[Bryad Polis Valentino]

It is exactly that. Sometimes, we don't know what dark or light is, confusing the two.

Willpower comes and goes for me. Trust me, we always think we are in control but seldom are. I wish I knew freedom, but knows what it's like to be on a marionette, as it would surprise power can mean you are just an unwilling puppet.

This was about when I went through the ordeal, and made one of my initial pacts/bonds.

It is a representation as what I feel is my greatest strength and weakness, something I love and hate.

I am a sorcerer, wizard, and more. It's more than what I pass it off as. If you are ever interested, we have free books on magick and more on darkbooks.org we prefer you to study that way.

I am the acting headmaster of Avalon, or The Reformed Avalonion Order, who provides opportunities for all. We also officiate the ordeal, what's needed as a contract of sorts to be able to verify someone's one intent. This is to pass on the higher level secrets of what I call the Ars Magicka, which is filled out daily by me and 600+ other Avalon associates.

I could tell you anything, but this is about how at times I give into the darkness, as a secret desire which I don't really want. Have you ever felt this same way?