Dressed in Sadness

 

My secret thoughts reside

in the backyard of my existence

where darkness cries out in shivers

clear to my bones.

I wake up to find them

packed neatly on shelves in my mind

and wish I could just crawl away,

be left alone.

They come from my emotions,

dressed in sadness

with no intention of ever comforting

what they transform.

There are days

when they make a decision

to rearrange the places I stand

until I am left without hope,

forlorn.

My secret thoughts are the lyrics of my being

which bid my heart

to walk on a white canvas

of the purest snow.

Oh the damage

that could be done

if I spoke them aloud,

my true feelings revealed

with these eyes full of woe.

I cannot bend or I'll break

so I hide on these shelves

in my mind,

packed neatly away

from all that challenges

my tree of life,

such as falling leaves.

My secret thoughts control

how my tongue refrains

from speech,

So my true feelings,

you will.....

never see.

Author's Note

Photography by Kirsty Mitchell Photography

Reviews

[Veronica Chandler]

"...so I hide on these shelves
in my mind,
packed neatly away
from all that challenges
my tree of life,..."
This piece speaks to me and I feel 10,000 emotions all at the same time. Some parts lift me and other parts weigh heavy in my spirit. As usual, when I read your work I find comfort in the softness, and contrasts.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Veronica :)

[Veronica Chandler]

My pleasure...

[Margarette]

The poem comes out more of a psychological aspect to me. The subconscious mind to which we are not aware of tends to control most of the actions of the character in the poem and I think he/she may be going through some difficult times which may stimulate her inner thoughts. The ideal solution, indeed, is suppression. I love how I can relate to this poem more so, since I've also gone through this phase but I'm in better control now of myself. Thank you for sharing!

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Margarette :)

[ba_mcfarlane]

We all live our secret inner lives, where we accept life like it or not, where we cry silent and weep copious.It is but because all those small hurts, small cuts, they can bleed out the rare perfect hearts in our midst. they are rare, and I am surely not one of them.
This is what this write tells me.
My friend, you are both vulnerable,and you are strong like the brittle sunshine in the depth of a high summer afternoon.I know this because you wield your gentle virtue and sweet heart song like a glittering sword at all who dare to read you.
Such a brave write about your dark places...bravo.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you so much for all you said........it means the world to me.

[Zizzy Douglas]

really?

[Night]

...I know a place almost like that Neva, I have a room I keep my memories in. a room that i can lock. And when I want to feel again and remember, I unlock the door and I peer in looking for that certain one...I realized just the other day that this room is filled with little boxes...like safe deposit boxes in a bank. I don't have one for my thoughts, though now that you've penned this write...perhaps I should...a great write my friend...:)

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Night :)

[Yari Garcia (Older Prof..]

Very interesting and beautiful. As a person who is quite shy and a bit reserved, I can definitely relate to the words in this poem.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Moody :)

[sithlordjp]

Beautiful... I was very touched by this simple, yet powerful line: "in the backyard of my existence" It evokes so much for me. A backyard where we played as kids... A backyard where we buried our broken dreams... Loved it!

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you sithlordjp :)

[Ahmad Cox]

Aww. Very beautiful and heartfelt and emotional poem. I loved it.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Ahmad XX

[kayamon215]

very strong piece filled with intense emotions very well done

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you!

[Poetic Beauty]

As women we tend to mask our inner pain and hide what is really hurting us. We can have the brightest smile on our face, when inside our soul is crying tears that are drowning.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Poetic Beauty :)

[Poetic Beauty]

Thank you for writing a stunning visual piece.

[Frieda P]

This speaks to me of something very familial...of course I am reading from my own experience but those truths we keep hidden deep within us until they either kill us, make us more resilient or beg to be written. Whether in rhyme or the spoken word, those dark places are always dressed in darkness...

'when they make a decision
to rearrange the places I stand'

It's as if we have no control over these emotions, as if they have their own will and they rearrange themselves accordingly to our life circumstances....love that stanza. This one I read personally, it's full of pain and a voice screaming to be let out.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you so much Frieda :)

[Frieda P]

Always a pleasure reading you Neva :-)