Moon Dancing In Your Hands

Exquisite chains of unseen hours
All lie in fantasies
In countless dreams of unbloomed flowers
Moon dancing in your sea

Petals soft on beds of sand
Tremble at your touch
As their spirits are awakened by the hand
Of love's own velvet brush

Soulful cries of blissful glee
Echo to the moon
Resounding from the heart's own sea
Left enamored by the bloom

Beauty sweet and triumph slow
Swirling in the sand
Painting strokes of blooming glow
Moon dancing in your hands

Reviews

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

It's so funny. The words wash ashore and then pull away. I read again, and it's the same. There is such a sense of familiarity between the stanzas, almost as if there is repetition. This is not the case, however. It's just a cascade of poetic petals than transcend the screen. Your poem is ethereal, transcendent, and just plain magical.

Linda Marie Van Tassell

[FeliciaS (Poetic Prince..]

beautiful

[Cheyenne]

Graceful and lovley the format it is written in only adds to it!!

[Gomer LePoet]

very sensual, graceful and almost erotic piece here. I am reading things in here that maybe are in my mind only. love it Neva.

[FlawedByDesign]

Wow!
There so many exquisite lines in this poem which render the whole piece into a portrait of love for the ages. It has such a great flow and smart rhymes that tend to the rhythm and pull off a symphony without a hitch :)

My favourite stanza has to be,
"Petals soft on beds of sand
Tremble at your touch
As their spirits are awakened by the hand
Of love's own velvet brush"
I draws the female body in my head, softened with petals. The trembling makes me imagine goosebumps on her body as my hand glides across her skin awakening her senses and the passion (spirits) hiding withing.

Truly wonderfully done!

***This poem deserves more reviews and more attention from the readers, SO IF YOU'RE READING THIS, give the poem the praise it warrants :)***

[Abdul Aziz]

Ah, I'm a fan of traditional poetry, and I'm a fan of this write!

Great flow, and a great sense of rhyme and rhythm.

This pome moves gracefully and elegantly with one beautiful image to the next. And though it is short, it leaves a lasting impact on the reader, with the words dancing in the reader's mind.

The "glitches" in this poem come in the third line of the second stanza, and the last two lines of the third where the poem veers off the good meter it has established.
Maybe V2 L3 can be changed to "Their spirits awakened by the hand". I believe it lends the stanza a better flow.
But V3 L3 and L4 are a trickier proposition. The words are really enchanting, and I wouldn't want to change them, but I think that the poem would be perfect if you can just make these particular lines sound in sync with the rest of the poem. The lines sound great when read individually, but stick out just a bit when read together.

But then again, I'm only nitpicking.

This is a great write, with some fantastic imagery, and lines I will not forget.
This is going into my favorites right now :)
100/100

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

An image of moon dancing in your hands is so lovely as is the entire poem.

Soft and lovely.

Chloe

[Gone]

Only a lovely woman could write such a delicate piece. Like gossamer blowing in a gentle summer breeze.

[charlotte talley]

great poem, and the picture goes great with the meaning. I just wish I could write poetry.