~Friendships

The friendship I have with my ex [July 2007]

There are things I know about you that no-one else does

Imagine if I told the people

But I wouldn’t do that –

After all what if you told them something about me?

I wouldn’t want that to happen;

But equally I wouldn’t want to hurt you, me and you, or me:

 

The morning after I lost my virginity to you

I told two close friends, and one of them said,

“I hope that you, D, and you and D are good”

 

That’s what I mean when I say I don’t want to hurt me and you.

 

In a way I’m glad that it is only me that knows those things;

We are all individuals,

But occasionally a different friendship can have different qualities;

What I had…and have with you is different from what you have with others –

I just have to keep reminding myself.

 

I don’t understand the flower-giving though:

If you don’t like flowers,

Why didn’t you discard the first one I left for you two weeks afterward?

To me, a white flower symbolises friendship, peace and unity.

Perhaps you don’t see those elements and you genuinely dislike petalled suns.

 

You gave me a red rose on Valentine’s Day:

In the same vase it bloomed and wilted,

But that’s what flowers do.

 

I had to make do with white roses this time around;

Petalled suns weren’t on sale in Waitrose.

But I wish you hadn’t thrown it into the road for a heavy wheel to tread upon.

 

I know I returned with a fresher one to your house a few hours afterwards,

You crept up behind me and joked “stalker!”

Now you tell me it has no bottle.

We shall see.

 

[Twenty minutes later]

 

Now it has a home.

Reviews

[R J Askew]

'But that's what flowers do' is a telling line. It seems to sum up relationships, too. There is a strong wistfulness about this poem, which i enjoyed. You reflect wisely...and have come away with a friendship it seems, which is good. And of course he will always be significant to you on account of what he won from you it seems.