Oculus

Just a few thoughts.

Your eyes are like windows

They tell me more than your soul

You always tell me how you feel

Without saying a word

Quite honestly I tend to get lost in them

I don't mean to but they seem so inviting

They're like pools

That I want to jump into

And swim through,

Your mind.

Author's Note

Suggestions for improvements, probably unfinished.

Reviews

[Sasha]

I'm conflicted. I like how you started this because it usually goes that eyes are windows to your soul, but you implied that they expressed more than the soul they lead to. Then again, you still referred to them as windows which I felt took away from that point. I dunno. Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but that's the impression I got. I liked that you took the standard "they're like pools" and added that you wanted to swim through their mind. Overall, it's lovely. I just would've liked to see more original and inventive ways to express your thoughts on this person's eyes.

[Alexandria Smith]

:D I loved it. "And swim through, your mind."

[The Wave]

i like this

the flow was great up until the ending, i think if you broke down some lines into two, it would read a little smoother...
"You always tell me how you feel without saying a word." could be "you always tell me how you feel" and "without saying a word". if that makes sense.

overall, loved your words,
good job