I'm fine

I'm fine

A Poem by Danny
"

Hiding your feelings......

"
She says she's fine
but inside she is dying
deep down her heart is hurt.
When she's with you she looks fine
but when she's alone she's fragile.
She is full of dreams
she wants to travel
to meet other people
to enjoy in life
to kiss under full moon.
Maybe one day she will be happy 
ready to move on
and she will say "I'm fine"
and it wouldn't be a lie.

© 2014 Danny


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Featured Review

You've never meet me Daniel,yet you were able to express every single thought,sentiment and dream of mine.That says a lot about your talent as a writer.I love this poem,easy to connect to and full of emotion and even a hint of home.Thank You for sharing. :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Danny

6 Years Ago

Thank you for that kind review! :)



Reviews

A splendid read and write...Thank you for sharing...:)....................

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Danny

6 Years Ago

Thank you! :)
Sami Khalil

6 Years Ago

You are welcome...:)..................
I liked this, I kind of changed it a tad tough but it is just a suggestion to make it flow easier....

~~~

She says she's fine,
but inside she is dying -
deep down her heart is hurting.
When she's with you, she looks fine
but when she's alone, she's fragile.

She is full of dreams;
Wanting to travel
and meet other people;
to enjoy life;
to be kissed under the full moon.

Maybe one day she will be happy
and ready to move on;
She will say be able to say "I'm fine"
and it wouldn't be a lie.

~~~

Just an Idea, I never changed much as you'll see, mainly punctuation but I'm not an expert, aha.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Danny

6 Years Ago

Thank you for a suggestion, I'll keep that in mind with future writing. I'm a beginner at writing po.. read more
You've never meet me Daniel,yet you were able to express every single thought,sentiment and dream of mine.That says a lot about your talent as a writer.I love this poem,easy to connect to and full of emotion and even a hint of home.Thank You for sharing. :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Danny

6 Years Ago

Thank you for that kind review! :)
good !!!!!! nicely penned
ahena :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Danny

6 Years Ago

Thank you! :)
A lovely poem. Thanks for sharing.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Danny

6 Years Ago

Thank you! :)
Praveeta

6 Years Ago

You are welcome.
It should be "hurt" not "hurted"

This is great. So relatable.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Danny

6 Years Ago

I have corrected it.Thanks!

And thank you for review! :)

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270 Views
6 Reviews
Rating
Added on January 12, 2014
Last Updated on January 13, 2014
Tags: Feelings, truth

Author

Danny
Danny

Stolac, Bosnia and Herzegovina



About
Hi, I'm Daniel. I'm 25 and I'm studying English language and literature at local university. I love reading. Recently I started writing poetry. That's all about me! :) more..

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