Shut Out The World

They say you speak in a whisper

But life tends to be as loud as a twister

You have something to say

But to all these distractions I fall prey

God, you know I want to listen

But it’s so hard with this world’s noisy tradition

It’s so hard to shut out the world

So won’t you lay here with me?

And shut out the world

 

Lock me in this place forever

Let me rest in the arms of my intercessor

God, let me hear your voice

Help me to tune out all the noise

All that matters is you and me

Right now I’m on my knees

Help me to shut out the world

Held me in your arms

Because with you I know there can be no harm

Shut out the world and lay here with me

Let your voice be like a calming breeze

Shut out the world

Shut out the world

Reviews

[MomzillaNC]

Very nice prayer. We all need to take time apart to be alone with God.

NOTES: "[Hold] me [ever and always] in your arms" to help balance the meter.

"Shut out the world [with me, please]"
[double paragraph break] to insert a blank line before the closing statement of your poem.
"Shut out the [world…]"

You might be interested in my poem "The Gift of Sabbath" http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/MomzillaNC/1423722/

[Riley Justine]

The flow gets a little bit rough at the end, I would read it over and adjust it a bit, but otherwise a very well-written piece