The Uncovered

Jasper. Green like jasper. And more precious to me than any stone ever revealed to men or angels.

He had smiled and squeezed her arm, but only for a second, as his attention was riveted on the game he was playing. She had said nothing else but went to quietly sit on the carpet at his feet, hugging his left leg and resting her head on his knee.

She had been happy then. He had no doubt about it. With her, he had never been forced to wonder, to try and guess what she was feeling, to taste the bitterness of doubt. She was always there, always his, no questions asked, no limitations, no restraints.

Green like the stone he had been named for, his eyes now stopped on the face in the mirror. It was a curious face in more than one way. For one, the colour of his eyes looked almost incongruous with the dark olive skin and even darker hair that nature had blessed him with. The lips were thin and almost cruel, though no one would have called them that, not to his face. The nose a standard of perfection, both in size and shape. The cheeks were high and narrow, although of late they had begun filling up ever so slightly, which only added to his charm.

Yes, he was handsome, one more point he had no doubt about. And if he ever questioned that, there were always dozen of women more than willing to set his mind at ease.

But is this really what you’re searching for, my boy? Is this what makes you happy?

Jasper hated it when his thoughts turned towards happiness again. He wasn’t happy, damn it. He wasn’t even close to happy. In fact, if anything, he felt closer than ever to growing dissatisfied and disgusted not only with his life, but with his own precious self.

Ha! Precious! Would you look at that!

The only time he had ever been precious was when he was looking into her eyes. The eyes that time and time again had gazed at him adoringly, like he was not a messenger from Heavens, but rather an embodiment of all that’s pure and good and sacred.

He still remembered how scared he had felt when she had uttered the exact same words:

“You, Jasper, are a higher being. Higher than even you can see right now. If the Heavens ever opened to spill their treasure onto Earth, nothing among those precious gifts could even compare to you. You’re more than that. You are the essence of all that’s pure and good and sacred.”

He had stopped playing then because, damn, the girl knew how to flatter a guy and command his attention. Even when she was fully clothed and showed no immediate interest in getting naked with him.

Not that she’d ever turned him down either. No, the love she’d given him had been more than sacred. It had had a very physical quality to it too, one they had enjoyed together more times than he could count.

So where is she now, Jasper? Why isn’t she still in your life? How long will you keep trying to forget her, to leave her in your past, to pretend that you don’t love her, that you never did?

A grim and ruthless smile gleamed in those jasper eyes.

As long as it takes.

*************************

When Tracy did lift her dark blue eyes, they were swimming in tears. Big, fat, sparkling tears, catching seductively in such amazingly long ashes people still asked her, every now and then, if they were fake or real.

But they were real all right. Just like the tears. Just like the bruise that she felt had already begun to form on her right cheek. Just like the pain she felt around her wrist, where James had now closed his fingers in an iron vise.

“Say it again. And make it louder this time.” he demanded.

“I am a w***e. I don’t deserve you. I need you to teach me a lesson so I don’t make the same mistake a…”

She never got the chance to finish her sentence. The hand that fell brutally over her mouth was so heavy, she lost her balance and fell flat on her a*s. Good thing the carpet was rich and soft, she managed to tell herself while struggling to get back on her feet.

Though he didn’t get a chance to do that either.

“Down, you b***h! Stay down! Or do you want to get a taste of my boot as well as my hand? Get on your knees and don’t you move a finger unless I tell you to”.

So Tracy did. On her knees on the floor, she once again lifted her eyes to James, watching with thrilled anticipation as he pulled out his leather belt. Wondering what sweet, delicious torture he was going to inflict this time. Hoping it wouldn’t sting too badly. Hoping it would.

“Now lift your hands and turn your palms up. Good girl, Tracy”.

She did as she’d been told. By now she felt the fear mingle with excitement. And a hefty dose of arousal, too, but then arousal was always a part of the equation where James was concerned.

“Close your eyes and don’t move”.

Tracy closed her eyes. Expecting pain, she was surprised when she felt James kneel in front of her and start kissing her palms at the bottom of each finger. Sweet, tender kisses, first with the lips, then with the swirl of his tongue running up to the tip of each finger.

Then came the pain. Moving blindingly fast, James had stood up and lowered the doubled up leather of his belt on the quivering flesh of her exposed palms. Hard. Then once again, harder.

“Beg for it”, he gasped. “Beg for me to go on or beg for me to stop it. But I will hear you beg”.

Tracy opened her eyes and looked him in the face. And she was smiling now. She could see how hard he was. Her arousal was just as strong. The fun, then, had begun.

“I’m begging you”, she said. “Don’t stop”.

 

**************************************

… as long as it takes. And then some. And when you get to the end of the rope, you’ll tie a knot and hold on.

The part about the tying of the knot was something she had read in a book, a long, long time ago. She could remember neither the book, nor the author, but that line had stuck with her.

Especially now, when her mind was stubbornly asking her, again and again and again.

Really, now, Sophie, how much longer are you going to wait?

And she stubbornly answered, again, and again, and again.

As long as it takes. And then some…

Because she really had no choice. She’d tried and tried and then tried some more, but all in vain. Erasing Jasper from her heart was proving as impossible as erasing consciousness of her own existence. He was simply that much a part of her.

But Sophie, dearest, it was just a summer fling. But Sophie, sweetheart, he’s part of the past. But Sophie, darling, it’s time you got over him. But Sophie, pumpkin, you don’t even exist for him anymore. But Sophie…

The voices of her friends were still vivid in her mind as she studied herself in the bathroom mirror. But still couldn’t overpower the little voice inside of her that said They’re wrong. They didn’t know him. Not like you did.

They hadn’t known him and they hadn’t loved him. Nor had he given any of them a chance to really see beyond the mask. To them, he was simply an attractive guy who was still looking to sow his wild oats and heal after a disastrous marriage. Whereas Sophie was the poor fool who had fallen in love with him and was now paying the price. Dearly.

The eyes she lifted to the mirror were those of a stranger. Black like the dead of night and just as hollow. There was nothing there but the shadow of the unutterable sadness that still weighed her heart, even now, four months after the break-up. The sadness that left room for nothing else.

She searched her face and made an effort to remember what she had looked like only one year before. The same pale skin, the same unfathomable eyes, the same brown hair with just a hint of red in it. The same generous mouth that loved to kiss and smile. The same fine cheeks that loved to find themselves nestled in the palms of his hands. The same wide brow that would sometimes crease with worry when she felt something was wrong with Jasper. When she was trying to work something out to help him. To make him happy. As happy as she’d been.

Still, there was something missing and she knew exactly what. Before she’d met him, she had been the kind of person endowed with a huge capacity for happiness and loving life. The light of all that love and happiness had given her that special glow that was now gone forever.

Gone like her happiness. Gone like her joy. Gone like the heart that now belonged to him.