not to sentimental

not to sentimental

A Poem by Moonflower

Her fingers drift

fall.ing

over keys and notes

 

She doesn't mind

the shift

and stumbles across

the breaking

point

 

No one sees hers

in the dark

As she gasps in

simple breaths

 

Delicate

the flame that

flickers

Smoke filling

her ample

breast

© 2010 Moonflower


Author's Note

Moonflower
*A quick thought before i head to work!*

My Review

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Reviews

Word choice is excellent! Simple in structure, but there is an underlying meaning here. Good piece! Thanks for sharing. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


Interesting imagery in this. Did you mean to have a period in the middle of falling?

Posted 13 Years Ago


It's beautiful. It seems so complex, but in reality it's so simple. Ver hard to inderstand, but I think she died in the end. Amiright? O.O it's was very beautiful, great write.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Simple style, but there's a lot going on..it's complex on the inside, simple on the outside. that's the way i understood it.. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


sounds like she doesn't care anymore or maybe I was wrong...
this one is hard to make cuz of the simple yet complex note...
hurm...
hard to say...
one thing for sure, this one does have the lack of emotion of your other work...
nevertheless...well written Desiree :)

Posted 13 Years Ago



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365 Views
25 Reviews
Rating
Added on August 15, 2010
Last Updated on August 15, 2010

Author

Moonflower
Moonflower

Louisville, KY



About
Hello :) My name is Desiree. What brings me to this website is my love for poetry and storytelling. At this time I consider myself more of a poet, than a writer or author. I do not have the pa.. more..

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