Cheating Eyes

Cheating Eyes

A Poem by Destinyxi

Cheating Eyes

 

Now I don’t know what you can handle

But I sure as hell

Know what I can handle

 

Your eyes

They cheat every minute

Every time a pair of

Young

Soft

Firm

Legs walk by you

You look

Take in

Devour

 

Now why don’t you tell me

How you expect to get yourself a girl

When all you do is eye

What isn’t yours

What you can’t have

 

Now tell me why you’re blinded

By the fact that

There’s a girl standing

Right in front of you

With a pair of legs

That you’ve never seen

A small, delicate face

That you can’t forget

A bright, white smile

That takes your breath away

 

Now why don’t you tell me

What in hell's name

You’re doing looking at what

You can’t have

And not trying to capture

What’s within your grasp

And leaning over you

Begging to be taken

© 2012 Destinyxi


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Reviews

Looking is fine and natural, men cant help it.. But i agree had exs like that, when they leer and drool and then flirt openly....its disrespecting the woman they are with.. making her feel worthless and not cherished. I dont think they realize how much we get hurt and silently take it in behind the false smile.. i did mention it once to one of my exs.. His response was '
" ok i wont do it when i am in front of you, just do it when you are not around" :) thats men for you.. But i must say have been with some that look yes and glance but doesn,t drool and flirt... fantastic poem !!!!!!

Posted 8 Years Ago


Destinyxi

8 Years Ago

Thank you very much!
This made me smile in an, I'll admit, arrogant manner. I'll tell you why in a moment.

As a poem, this is well done and well thought out. You have a good grasp of how to format to drag the reader's eyes down the page. Each line is punctuated by feeling and truth. Your words are simple, the meaning clear and strong. Everything seems to be great in terms of spelling and grammar. I've often seen missteps in poems on this site, little spelling mistakes or odd bits of phrasing. Not here though.

Now, for the arrogant smile I mentioned.

You've only got one side of the story, one camera angle of the tale. You don't have a male's point of view. And there is not one hint of the reverse. I'll admit though, this could be about two girls. But for now I'll work from one assumption.

First things first. Why do we look? Because we can, because we not so secretly want what we don't have. We froth at the mouth for what we can't. When I say that I mean humans in general, not just one gender. We're all slaves to our lusts in one form or another. You could just as well ask yourself, why do you have to have more than five pairs of shoes, such an extensive wardrobe? Why all the possessions? Why can you not admire just one painting? Listen to one song over and over?

Simple. Boredom.

Make no mistake. Every human on the planet has cheating eyes. It's in our nature. Of course, as logical beings we have the ability to rise above. I won't burden you with my own personal life stories, likely you wouldn't believe them anyway.

So lastly, and partially because I'm the type of person who likes to antagonize, I want to rearrange something in the poem.

"Now tell me why you’re blinded
By the fact that
There’s a guy standing
Right in front of you
With a pair of shoulders
That you’ve never seen
A strong, handsome face
That you can’t forget
A wide, masculine smile
That takes your breath away"

"Now why don’t you tell me
What in hell's name
You’re doing looking at what
You can’t have
And not trying to capture
What’s within your grasp
And leaning over you
Begging to be taken"

Something to think about, no? Women aren't the only ones that long to be loved for who they are. Besides, I would rather love a person with cheating eyes than a cheating heart and body.

Great poem by the way.

-Caradoc

Posted 8 Years Ago


Bewitching Sensation

8 Years Ago

i agree Caradoc with most of what you say.. but in my experience men that drool and cheat with their.. read more
Caradoc

8 Years Ago

Sadly it goes both ways. The number of people who can look and flirt, but not cheat with body and/or.. read more
Bewitching Sensation

8 Years Ago

Thankyou Caradoc.. must be one out there somewhere :)
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C.
I liked this (:

Posted 8 Years Ago


hey this is good love it really well written the meters are strong and have built good stanzas really enjoyed it

Posted 8 Years Ago


Wow, again another a great write! I love this and I totally know what you're talking about. I have a few guy friends that are like that. I do have to admit I have a crush on one of them, I stand there wanting to be noticed but they just stare at another girl that's already taken. I just want to slap him or whistle to get his full attention. Why bother? If he really he wants me, he should show it. If he doesn't then so be it! That's his loss right? Think of your situation like that:) Wonderful job.

Ashley Rivers-- your friend ;)

Posted 8 Years Ago


Destinyxi

8 Years Ago

Haha you tell him girl, his loss is another mans gain :P It's just too bad that he missed out.
read more
Call_Me_Miss_Imperfect

8 Years Ago

Haha, I will :) and I'll check it out. :)
Bewitching Sensation

8 Years Ago

been there done that .. the same as they did to me to a bloke.. they go absolutely mad .. lol ;)
wow

Posted 8 Years Ago


I really like the concept or topic behind this, those roving eyes, those chasing men, and the women who must endure such lack of diplomacy?

Again, I find how you write about relationship appealing, in that, it uncovers gender differences and explores femininity. Which to me as a reader, is a continual and living fascination.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Destinyxi

8 Years Ago

Haha yeah, I'm quite the feminist as hopefully some of my readers have noticed. I think extremely hi.. read more
Eloha

8 Years Ago

Then I'd like to read more of your feministic literature.
Bewitching Sensation

8 Years Ago

Me too look forward to reading your writing x
Great atitude as always! Instead of sympathy (Which seems to be the usual voice for themes like this) you go for anger and hold the strength that is common in all your writing! Great job!

Posted 8 Years Ago


ewest1220

8 Years Ago

sorry not anger, attitude XP
laughing here... you a fine sense of the "ridiculous"!

...And yes the sitcom is an everyday thing quite for real - so few know what they "have" until they don't, and some not even then.

Posted 8 Years Ago


"begging to to be taken" I like your writing style

Posted 8 Years Ago



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Added on July 26, 2012
Last Updated on July 26, 2012

Author

Destinyxi
Destinyxi

Montreal, Canada



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** If I don't get reviewed from someone who sends me several read requests per day, then I won't review their work, simple as that. Sorry haha** If you like my work, please let me know! A littl.. more..

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