A Poem by DookieSmiles

He keeps trying to get ahold of her to express his true feelings for her and to ask for forgiveness not knowing it's to late and he has been talking to her voicemail the entire time.

I know it's early in the morning.
I just have somethings to get off my chest, is why I'm calling.
I close my eyes and your all I see.
I'm not looking for empathy or your sympathy.
I deserve this empty loneliness.
Your my reason for reason, my only weakness.
I know you hate me, I played a game with your heart.
Games over, no restart.
I know men aren't supposed to cry.
But your the only reason I'm still alive.
Give me those eyes, I just want to feel your kiss.
Whoever said the grass is greener has never been on this side of the fence.
I hate that I've hurt you!
Please know that I still love you!
Don't sail away! In all fairness.
Your not the same, you shine different.
I'm just a rock to you, the gem.
All my lies set off your alarm.
I know it's good to embrace these feelings.
Deep down I know my love was missing.
Your truly special, I can't explain.
I'd follow you anywhere. Your no plain Jane.
I want to change, is there anyway you'd give me another chance?
What are you crying for?
"All I wanted was to see you more!"
Tell me what it's going to be?
"Your my king and I'm your queen!"
I'll do anything you want me to do!
Here I am, I belong to you.
All of our time goes by so fast. We will soon be dust.
Trust our lust is a must.
I can't pretend. I know this is the end.
I just called to say I'm sorry for everything I've done.
I miss you and I miss home.
Call me back if you get this message.
I hate you can't see the wreckage.

© 2017 DookieSmiles

Author's Note

Trying something a little different I guess. Plz give me honest review

My Review

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overall not too bad but you make alot of mistakes with "your" vs "you're". I cant tell if its really clever because it shows the delusional egotstical ramblings of someone who acted selfishly and now regrets it because it no longer serves his interests. Or if it is just a little egotistical. Eitherway, well done for enticing real emotion! Keep writing :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


6 Years Ago

Guilty as charged when it comes to your and you're. I just get in the zone and start typing. You sho.. read more
i thought it was clever what you did here. Anyone who goes into long speeches about their emotions and monopolizes conversation is better off just talking to the voicemail. Nicely done!

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I needed this piece more than you realize I wish the guy would read this. thank you so much for this the emotions it stirred up are real and I feel. keep writing you're great.

Posted 6 Years Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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3 Reviews
Added on February 2, 2017
Last Updated on February 2, 2017
Tags: Love, break up, make up, girlfriend, boyfriend



Kansas City, MO

Just a guy with a pen and paper. I'm new to poetry so take it easy on me 🤗 more..