Overlapping

Critic me

A twist of the door knob opening the fresh cool breeze of the nightly cold front. You pass the door as the click of it closing is overcoming by the reflection of the moonlight on the water before you. No need for music the phone goes silent, just the echoes of your shoes against the sidewalk and then the grass.
You look as the vacant park is nothing more than metal tied too but more metal and string. But you look at itna smile appears. You see the happenings of children and hear each laughter of the parents and children alike. It must be nice too have that glee. You pass the water park the engines still awake but your focus is on the dock as the reflecting moonlight calls your name.
You grab the sidebar as the cold breeze welcomes you. The sky never was this clear until you looked up and witness the stars dance for you. The silence only interrupted by your breathing was never so beautiful.
You sit down and stare at the water. You close your eyes and listen, as the waves overlapping each other mix with tbe silence left behind.

Author's Note

I welcome all critics.

Reviews

[Relic]

Why do you welcome critics?

[Semaj]

I want too improve on my writing. Techniques and styles are easier too learn from trial and error than from reading them. Also its my way of getting people too say what's right and wrong or how too better emphasive on points.

[Relic]

You need to study diction and how to make each line more graceful. I'm trying to study that to. Speaking of to, the too you're using should be to, with one o. Grammar is important. Run-on sentences aren't good. I think you have potential. You just need to study more. As a lot of us do. Good luck.

[Semaj]

Thank you. Good luck too you as well.