Fountain Pen

Fountain Pen

A Poem by Dusky
"

Just something I scrawled one day.

"

 Fountain Pen built the earth,

                    built the sky,

Made the joker sing

                    and the maiden cry,

Fountain pen made them hope,

                    made them fear,

Sculpted their lives, what they touch,

                    see and hear,

Fountain Pen is their master,

                    their maker,

But the one of undoing, that is

                    the Eraser.

© 2008 Dusky


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Reviews

I liked this write simple and straight. Like the lay out and the rhyme, falls together nicely, very well written.

Posted 16 Years Ago


I like the rhyme and repetition a lot. The only thing I would say would be to add a comma after the first line of the piece. A pause there will create a better rhythm to start the poem. I like the simplistic philosophy and psychology behind this, and hope to see more great poetry like this from you in the future. Welcome to WritersCafe.

Posted 16 Years Ago


Great write - simple and well written.
Loved your central motif of the fountaun pen. Your use of repetition was effective - it gave the poem a real structure as well as reinforcing your message. I think your use of varying line length was interesting also.
Congrats on this write. I see you are new to the site - I hope you enjoy your time here.

Posted 16 Years Ago



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126 Views
3 Reviews
Rating
Added on June 24, 2008
Last Updated on August 20, 2008

Author

Dusky
Dusky

United Kingdom



About
I'm 16 years old, from the UK, and a fledgling writer. I've been writing for some time now, having always been a fan of books and creative writing, but it's only recently that I've started to share my.. more..

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