for ben

I don't know if I can do this

the grief is too raw

just the other day we were watching

funny videos on youtube

and you were making trumpet noises

every time

I had to blow my nose

 

I remember

the first night I came to third shift

I would catch you looking at me

sizing me up

trying to decide if I was going to fit in

was I going to get offended

would I be any fun

 

I thought you were young

but maybe you were older

than all of us put together

you shared both your joy

and your heart break

you talked and listened

 

I still think

that I might see you dancing there

if I turn my head real quick

 

it is a nightmare

 

knowing that you are gone

Reviews

[h d e rushin]

such depth and soulfulness.

"I thought you were young
but maybe you were older
than all of us put together"

What a way to exit a nightmare my friend.

Your amazing......ps: everything I've learned about poetry I learned from you...

dana

[Emily B]

I would say that everything I know about poetry I learned from you and john - you amaze me right back

[...]

You intended to touch, and you did...deeply, Emily. So sad, when someone you know is taken

[Emily B]

Thank you. Has been a difficult year

[SkinlessFrank]

You remind me Emily that when this happens, it's as though everything we thought we knew is now in question, everything, yet we never seem prepared. But how can we ever prepare?

[Emily B]

He was only twenty eight and taken in a senseless act of violence. The third coworker murdered since september eleven

[CD Campbell]

This is heart-wrenching and well written. I can understand the last two lines. I hate losing people. Getting older and feeling lost and dazed with every loss. There was a small pang of beauty in this like a sliver ray of sunshine coming underneath a door in a dark room. I loved it. CD

[Corset]

heartbreaking are some memories, even those not our own, you expressed this so beautifully, though there will be no consolation in that will there be? Two nights ago, I was falling asleep and i awoke with a pop between my eyes as if a air gun just shot me there, why I want to share that with you I am not sure, but John said that you would be the one to tell, of those things disconcerting, he held you in such high esteem, how could I not also be drawn to you?

[Emily B]

I still miss him every day.

You may not know the connection with the gun shot. Someone is lost. One day you will know the rest.

[Corset]

I'm not sure what that means, but, I trust you do, and I trust in you.

[kmartell]

I come back and it is amazing to read your poems. We must refuse the darkness. We must find our identities together. Thank you for your powerful insight.

[Alias]

I love the way this is not a generic love poem, not every-one can say this is true of them. Although the feelings are relatable, the experiences are your own, it tells a story.
Really good job x

[Emily B]

I started to correct you reference the love poem remark. But I did love Ben. He was my supervisor. Much younger. I didn't know him long enough. But we all loved him.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Very touching work... when someone touches our life their footprint is on our heart forever.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

extremely sad...one day he is there, the next the laughter is just in echoes of memory.

[Chris]

raw and as real as life gets... my condolences and understanding...