I Will

was gona post this before i all crashed..........iv had sum rough times and this is a 'promise' if thts wat u wnt 2 call it, that i will really try

 

I will just keep crying

These tears will never slow

It will just keep raining

The sun will never show

 

The pain will keep on throbbing

Keep tearing me apart

For the memory of you

Will cut through my bleeding heart

 

I will smile through my tears

Show the world that I am fine

I will adjust to the numbness

It will just take some time

 

I will embrace the loneliness

Though I still feel like I’m dying

I promised to resist deaths kiss

So now I will just keep trying

Reviews

[Enigma]

Wow!! Such an awesome poem.It has a sad feeling to it, but I enjoyed it all the same.I can even relate to it, pretty easily. You crafted your thoughts into words in a very impressive way.The rhyme is great, no doubt about it. And the way you've said to yourself that you'll keep on trying, it's very inspirational.
Great Job!!!

[Rie Sheridan Rose]

Reminds me of The Crow...has that same sense of hopeless love to it...

[He@ther!]

Great job!!:) As Siya said its sad yet emjopyable because you've written it so well:) I love your rhyme scheme and your expression throughout the piece:) Its truly a great write:)

[Pj]

I read this one of yours from your notebook, a fair time back. But it still reaches my heart and gives it a squeeze...You rhyme so naturally and it just flows and sometimes during your poems, I don't want it to end. People can get lost in your tangle of words.

Such talent!

[Kena Dawn Augustine]

Rather good for a teenager. I wrote like this when I was younger as well, and I still do, I use more metaphors now. Nice piece.I can feel your pain. And it was very smooth, the stanzas flowed very well. keep writing!

[Raven Held]

This is such a gripping and poignant piece!

Love the regular rhyme scheme, and sensitive diction.

Thanks for sharing :)

Loves,
Raven

[Aries]

Beautifully written...it makes the reader feel what you feel....A Great Write!

[Amor-de-angel]

The flow was spot on...This maybe sad but I think it shows that maybe you are ready to grasp onto the fact that it can get easier eventually,nothing comes easily.
Good poem full of hope through the tears,
Well done

[PianoandPage]

"Will cut through my bleeding heart"

maybe try "will cut my bleeding heart" it flows better.

again dark but for the most part has good flow.

[Blade & Blood (The ..]

Yeah, you gotta embrace yourself before things will change. It took me awhile to figure that out. Nice poem! (Love the rhymes!)

Ironically Yours. Blade and Blood