Big Bang Theory

love like a galaxy

You split my heart
like an atom
and BANG!
My love for you
became a galaxy,

or countless galaxies
to be exact

and the shattered pieces
of my broken heart
circle my world
like the rings of Saturn.

The stars were than
ripped from our eyes
and plastered across
the vast black sky,

and your fiery words
became the burning Sun:
beautiful,
but built to destroy.

When the atom burst
and your notions became endless
my mind became lost
in your atmosphere. 

Author's Note

Please let me know what you think with critical and good reviews. Thank You :)

Reviews

[John Fitzgerald]

i love the idea here! it is also executed very well. love is the all-conquering element and will become the world! well done! :)

[Jack Isaac]

Awww... I was hoping for a physics lesson... not! I always love metaphors of celestial ways in terrestrial plays.. that's why the title caught my eye. Well, science is fun I'll admit. Just a humble suggestion, instead of 'The stars were than' try saying something like 'The stars in our eyes / were ripped out...'

The passive voice in that line takes away from the passion of lost innocence. Make it an active voice IMO. Otherwise no complaints about this write, at all. The imagery and flow work great, and speaks many truths all can relate to. Very nicely done!

[Distant horizons]

Well thmis sounds to me a unique way of describing loss, and brilliantly done. This is a feeling we all know so well, but struggle to communicate as perfectly as you have done here. Exceptional.

[Bridger Hall]

*Than= THEN
The stars were THEN
ripped from our eyes
and plastered across
the vast black sky

these four lines here are so freaking good! and then after too.. your firey words became the burning sun! that is so narley! haha i love your writing. keep posting more! i read it all.