Crying

Crying

A Poem by Martina
"

The harsh reality of today's world is just too hard for a kid to handle

"

Crying, was all she did
had no strength to talk or walk
not even to move a finger
The once strong girl is forever lost

All inside of her head
Wishing she could be free again
Crying, she saw the real world
The reality world of today

Now she sleeps
Always hoping to be free from her cage
holding her stuff bear with dry tears
Only hearing faint "Be strong" behind of her door

© 2010 Martina


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A good theme, but I'm not really a fan of this - sorry. More length should probably fix that! There's a lot of emotion in there, but I don't think the words are impactful enough to make the poem that short. A little pointer would be the change "the once strong girl" into "the once strong little girl", since you're talking about a kid. Also, "stuffed", not "stuff".

Aaaand, sorry if I'm sounding a little harsh, lol.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Excellent, like every single one of your other pieces you wrote. I enjoy to read everything you write, and sometimes they make me sad, but they are always beautiful.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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195 Views
2 Reviews
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Added on June 23, 2010
Last Updated on June 23, 2010

Author

Martina
Martina

Wonderland, LA



About
Hello people =) Hello my name is Martina and I'm 19 years old; graduated from high school with very high dreams of becoming a well known author; (for about let see 10 years). I'm easy to .. more..

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