Merlin's Story

Comment suggestions: Areas that I'd like you to base your comments on..
Beginning - Is it slow or lacking in pace and punch?
Beginning - Does it engage and draw you into the rest of the story?
Ending - Did all plot elements resolve?
Ending - Was it climactic or anti-climactic? Was it exciting?
Characters - Are they realistic?
Characters - Were you sympathetic, or were they one-dimensional. Did they feel real?
Plot - Does it hold your interest?
Plot - Were there weak elements?
Plot - Could it do more? Was it fascinating?
Plot - How was the pace?
Language - Are there awkward phrasings?
Language - Is sentence length natural and does it result in an easy to read flow?
Dialog - How realistic was it? Did it feel like something you would say or hear?
Dialog - Did it help to deepen the characters?

I submitted this to short story slam on Bluebell Books blog and won an award!