In Spirit of The Holiday Season

 

Oh,joy to the world
I haven't seen a fruitcake
yet this year.
 
I still have nightmares
from last Christmas eve
from the one I received
yes, oh, my
 it brought me to tears
 
It came by way of mail
It was quite heavy and ugly
 and most definitely Stale!
 
So in spirit of the holiday season
being the nice vicious person I am
I gave it to my neighbors next door
now, gee wilkers whiz!
I don't understand
why they won't talk to me anymore?
 
I suppose it was the fruitcake,yep
they will turn your friends into foes
Why, what they're good for?
No one knows!
 
With all that goop spread
right on top
and filled with stuff
to make your heart stop
 
Oozing running down the side
to make you sick
Heavy enough I surmise
to sink a ship!
 
Maybe just maybe
one day, and gosh i hope soon,
we'll send that gawd-awful fruitcake
to the other side the moon
 
and by some magical power unclear
for the benefit of all mankind here
we'll make that dreadful fruitcake
 forever disappear
 
 

Reviews

[Aspiring Angel]

LOL Fran. I think that Fruit Cake tops my list of yucky. ROTFL I keep thinking that there has to be people that actually do like them or they would not be a traditional holiday goodie, but for the life of me I can't figure out what they like about them. Great write and a wonderful kick off to our holiday season.

I am sorry I have not dropped in before now but 'life' ya know? LOL

Hugs,
Lesa

[A sea person]

Thank you for submitting this to my contest! Sorry it took so long for me to get around to reading it! :)

It's funny hearing everyone complain about fruitcake - I love it. :)

v.r.
a-sea-person

[holly]

This one is a keeper, Fran - and you wrenched a wry smile from me since I have DEFINITE memories of annual, horrible fruitcake. A small, now defunct, firm I worked for in the 80's gave their employees a thoughtful gift every year: a "famous" fruit-of-the-month company's fruitcake. Needless to say, it was always regifted. Thanks (I think) for the memories!!!