Piss-Poor Explanation

Just read it.

My biggest sin.

If I must name it

It is pride.

To be wrong

Is to admit defeat.

Pride doesn't allow that.

To be at fault,

Is to admit fault.

Pride can't allow that.

Four months ago

I let it take the reins

I let it speak for me

I let it win.

That's no excuse.

But it is my sin.

You were right.

I was insensitive.

You were right.

I was hypocritical.

You were right.

I lied.

I've been lost.

For a year

I have not been able to see

I have not been able to think

Nothing made sense

Everything kept blurring.

The edges fogged together

And soon, I did wrong to you

The ones I loved most.

I never thought about it.

How those words might hurt you.

How it might twist in your heart

And stick in your head.

That was my insensitivity.

I never thought about it.

How I was no different.

How I did the same things

And I did all the time.

That was my hypocrisy.

I was so confused.

I thought you hated her.

I thought to be her friend

Would have made you upset

So I played the part

I thought you wanted to see.

I never meant to lie about you.

That was never my intention.

What I told her, I can promise

I thought I heard from you.

But what I was thinking then

I couldn't say.

Things have been so foggy for so long.

I feel like I've been sleeping for years.

But now I've woken up

Damn my pride.

I'll be the one to admit defeat.

I'll be the one at fault for it all

Because I miss you.

I'll make up what I must.

If it means we can try again.

Because in all honesty

Truly

I do miss you,

my friends.

Author's Note

It's crappy and poorly written. But. It's true.