Why is there?

The reason of things are unbeknownst to me
why must there be anything?
It is senseless. All of it.

I struggle daily when I realize things as such;
I cannot fathom why anything is
yet I cannot fathom not being here.

Some say it is akin to not being born,
there is just a lack of being.

But I cannot see why be born in the first place.
Must I deliver a child into this confusion?
I don't care if they get good grades, or even a good job
but are they a good person?
That should be all that counts.

Enjoying life is bittersweet when you know
it is senseless,
which in a way makes spontaneity
all the better.

Which may explain the puzzle in the first place.
Doing it just because
and being just because we can be.