It's always the same

Around the time I wrote this, a guy had royally screwed with my heart, and well I wrote this in his point of view.

Scream at me that I'm a horrible person
Punch me and push me, tell me I'm the last one
You'll ever trust with your fragile heart
And deteriorating bones.
You said you should of known from the start
When I couldn't even answer my phone
That'd I'd only hurt you 
But no matter what I f*****g do
You always hurt
I know, I know, I'm nothing more than dirt
And you've already burned my shirt
I don't care I don't care
I refuse to feel anything
And I'm sorry this isn't fair
But I've drank too much booze
Because I felt myself starting to loose
Yeah maybe I'm a sore looser
But god damn it I lost my self when I lost her
I've smoked too much greens
Because her love was all I'd need
But I'm lost in these tall a*s trees
Wondering if she'll ever find me.
Scream at me that I'm such a selfish prick
Hit me and push me, tell me I'm being a dick
Because I can't feel much of anything anymore
I've lost the ability to feel I'm sure.
Pass me the bud, and a shot
Tell me about how in hell I'll rot
I'll slowly loose my mind and my vision will blur
Every word I say will be a slur
And you'll take a deep sigh holding back tears
Leading me to bed, facing your fears
After all these damn years
You're still here, wondering when the end will be near
Cause I've got you feeling helpless and lost
And you're wondering of this cost
To be so sad for so long,
I wanted to say sorry, make it okay. 
But how much can my words do when I was so wrong
To ever hurt you, or put you through a stereotypical break up song
So I'll pass out drunk again
So in the morning you can
Scream at me about how I've made you hate men
Punch me, push me, tell me I'm such a shame
Because s**t'll never change, no it's always the same.