Deep therapy: Progress

Heather: I can tell that there is a lot on your mind.

Andre: Yes there is, there always seems to be.

Heather: Yes, But also remember that I was created to be an extension of your mind. I can provide you nothing more than companionship. I can be as gentle or as brutal as you allow me to be. I wish no ill will or over bounding success for you. Only...Progress.

Andre: Taking the neutral approach I see.

Heather: In this case, yes. You must make your own decisions.

Andre: Well I don't know if you have noticed with all that has been going on around here, but I there hasn't really been any sort of progress in my life recently. 

Heather: Progress doesn't always mean achieving success or victory. Progress is learning. You must fail at times in order to finally prevail. Sometimes it just takes....Time.

Andre: Then how can you help?

Heather: Again, I am nothing more than an extension of your mind. An extension of your current feelings. Your mind is designed to protect you from harm and stress as best as your intelligence will allow you to. Whenever you face danger or fear. You will decide between your natural instincts or towards more rational thinking that will guide you towards a safer approach. That is progress! Thinking through stressful situations. That is progress! I am a voice you can listen to. I am another perspective to see through. Not to influence you in any certain way. But certainly to be a voice to join you if you to find yourself alone in the dark.

Andre: Ah, the darkness. I was told as a young child that monsters lurk there. But in my experience, I find myself there quite a bit. I hear noises, eerie noises. I try to escape but then nothing changes. It's not until later that I can finally find the strength to look myself in the mirror. By then it's too late. I have become the very monster I was hiding from. 

Heather: It seems as if you fear changes in your life.

Andre: Sometimes I see change as a disappointing factor of life.

Heather: Because you are not in control?

Andre: No. Because I feel as if nothing ever breaks my way. 

Heather: That sounds like you're uncomfortable with not being in control.

Andre: Well then. How can I get in control of my life?

Heather: You can't.

Andre: What do you mean I can't? It's my life! I should be in control of it!

Heather: You can control your feelings! If you take the time to learn how. You can control how to react to what ever life throws your way. Again you must learn how to do this. I am unable to sympathize for you. You must accept that the majority of people you meet will be unable to do that for you as well. Accepting this will help with you not feeling so alone or unworthy. Your worth is determined by you alone. You must go out into the world and apply your skills and unique personality in able to press on with your life. It is never about controlling things to go your way. It's a matter of adapting to what ever happens and then taking the opportunities that present itself. It's repetitious, but it gets easier with time.

Andre: Perhaps I have been doing this all wrong?

Heather: Perhaps... 

Andre: There is just so much that I wish to do and there never seems to be enough time to get to everything. I wish to achieve a few things in my life before I die.

Heather: Remember, time is unbiased. It will never wait on one person or one thing. The ongoing passing of time is just as equal for you as it is for me. We all have our expiration dates set. As macabre as it seems, it is another thing that no one can control. Most of us have the blessing to not know when that date will come due. 

Andre: But why do I feel like there is more to life? As If I am wasting my days trying to fit into what others want for me?

Heather: Because there is! You would consider that a gut feeling. They are thoughts and feelings made in the state of confidence or sometimes in the state of worry. Confidence is a powerful yet dangerous tool depending how you were to act upon them.

Andre: I feel as if I have been taking my time building my confidence over the last few years.

Heather: Yet you're unhappy with the progress?

Andre: Progress is always satisfying for me. Slower than I would like it to be but after a while, I can see the work pay off. 

Heather: It seems to be a huge chore at the time, but dedication towards ones own progress usually always awards those who stay committed. 

Andre: And what if it does not?

Heather: Then you need to decide if the work you are putting in is worth it.

Andre: Again, sometimes I feel forced into things I don't even want for myself.

Heather: Then you need to understand that there may be other things that you should focus on. Being true towards your own passions will most likely lead you to places you couldn't even believe of going. It will amaze you the places you will go, the people you will meet, and the experiences you will gain if you just follow you gut regarding your passions. What direction does your inner compass point you in?

Andre: What do you mean by my inner compass?

Heather: If you where to close your eyes and imagine yourself waking up tomorrow and doing what you enjoy doing the most, what would it be? What is the one thing you could easily say that you are the best at in a room full of one hundred random people? Where would you be? From the sounds of it, you are not pointing north in regards to the direction you are currently going. Why not take some time and look within yourself and find what truly calls you.

Andre: Writing! Well, writing editing and traveling. That would be it. It would take me all over the world. I feel as though I am at war with myself between wanting to live a more settled down life, or living minimalistic to focus solely on writing. But I found that the last few years of trying, life gets harder. The perks of growing up and taking on responsibilities you know... There are times where things get easier, but I often wonder what it would be like if I shook things up and pursued writing.

Heather: What is the downside to living materialistic?

Andre:...

Heather: What do you have to prove?

Andre: I beg your pardon?

Heather: Are you trying to impress anyone?

Andre: I don't think so.

Heather: Then what' do you have to prove?

Andre: In regards to what?

Heather: Living minimally. Do you believe it would improve you life? You mentioned you have been pursing a more "settled" life. Does that mean you need to have a lot of "things"?

Andre: Well you know, a house, furnished well. a couple of cars.

Heather: And all of that is done to have you feel settled?

Andre: Well.. Yes.

Heather: Perhaps that is too much. Have you ever asked yourself when enough is enough? Having multiple versions of one thing? Someone across the country has more so you have to catch up or surpass them. Is it that you want to be able to compare yourself with them? Would that really make you happy?

Andre: Perhaps it is a adequacy thing.

Heather: To dream of having more is a great motivator. But the conversation has always ignored the dark part of it. You have to realize that you are only one person. You should enjoy life. Yet being presented with different options of the same thing entices people to want more. Pair that with a collectors heart and it never ends. You would need multiple warehouses to house your things. Now is that really practical?

Andre: No.

Heather: To sacrifice a skill and passion in order to just hopefully make it someday isn't progress. The grass may not be greener at the start, yet you can work and do what you do best and watch it grow and become that green pasture you've been dreaming of.

Andre: I am not sure if I am comfortable pursing it all though?

Heather: Are you comfortable now?

Andre...

Heather: You are clearly not even close to your destination yet. Of course, that journey will go on for the rest of your life. But wouldn't you like that journey to be easier. Less scrapes, bruises, doubts and worry. To be truly in your element. It will work because it is what you will live for. 

Andre: Seems like I have a lot of hardships I will have to face.

Heather: Hardships define the character. It's how you choose react to them. As well as how you choose to reflect on your past actions to have progress. 

Andre: But my actions are not always wrong.

Heather: You can always justify your actions in the heat of the moment but once you take the time to reflect, that is your chance to improve your character.