A World Act in One Scene

Never ask the smiling man why he bares his teeth unless you're ready to heed his answer.

 [Begin scene.]

 

[Enter stage left - Barnaby]

 

[Enter stage right - Fivel]

 

Fivel: Say, Barnaby, what a pleasant day isn’t it?

 

Barnaby: I couldn’t say, Fivel, there’s just too much for me to not dwell on.

 

Fivel: Now don’t be a stick in the mud, Barnaby!

 

Barnaby: I’m serious, Fivel. Just look at what’s going on.

 

Fivel: Ah, but you’re hardly involved in what’s not you! Come and take a--

 

Barnaby: I’m tired of doing this show. It serves no purpose, a distraction at most and it’s rather pisspoor at doing even that!

 

Fivel: Now ole’ chap you know that we were just thinking of a stoll down the Boardwalk? I hear a certain someone was…

 

[Barnaby turns to the audience.]

 

Barnaby: Why are you all here!?

 

Fivel: Ole’ chap! I’m over here! Why look at this, my shoe’s untied and I’m precariously near this dilapidated bookshelf! I hope the globe doesn’t teeter…

 

Barnaby: Stop slobbering in your seats! You think that a distraction will ease yourselves? We need action, not relief!

 

Fivel: Oh this knot! You really should give me a hand, Barnaby! I’m about to lose my balance---Oh!

 

[Fivel bounces around stage.]

 

Fivel: Oh!

 

Barnaby: Follow me! We’ll march to the governor, and demand that reform be enabled now! I’ve been thinking, we could just change a few laws--

 

Fivel: Oh!

 

[Fivel bounces into the bookshelf. The bookshelf falls forward, sending the globe flying.]

 

Barnaby: --and if our town starts, others will notice. Then we’ll demand the king--

 

[The globe strikes Barnaby’s head. He falls to the floors.]

 

Fivel: *lightly* Well that all worked out I suppose.

 

Fivel: *normal* So Barnaby so much for venturing out to the ole’ boardwalk ! All this fretting over the right colored shirt to impress Miss Primm was pretty silly. Because you’re dead!

 

Barnaby:

 

Fivel: Pretty silly….Because you’re DEAD!

 

Barnaby:

 

Fivel: *lightly* Barnaby, the punchline.

 

Fivel: Barnaby, you’re supposed to say “Well f**k.”

 

Barnaby:

 

Fivel: Barnaby… The punchline!

 

[Stage curtain begins to close. Stage hands enter stage left.]

 

Fivel: What about the punchline!?

 

[End scene.]

Author's Note

I usually proofread my works, however as always I'm sure there are typos and syntax errors. I appreciate any and all notices of that, and will work to correct those. If I haven't do know that I did acknowledge your notice and try implementing it, but found that it detracted from the effect I wanted and so omitted it.

Reviews

[Karolina S.]

If this is a commentary on the level of political awareness in this country (or lack of it), then it's quite nice. Theater in which the audience gets directly challenged by the actors doesn't seem to get done as much anymore, which is too bad. Nice tempo to this piece, as well.