And IT arrives

Just a chapter from my book:)

He sat in a white room which had two doors. One to his right, the other to his left. The room was filled with emptiness except his presence and a chair, in which he sat. He sat there with his arms resting on his knees and his hands supporting his chin. His eyes were pointed towards the ground.

He was waiting patiently for it to arrive.

What was that it?

It was called just it. 

Time was just an illusion inside the room. Then, there was click on the door towards his right. He could feel a presence before him.

It had arrived.

He didn't lift his head nor did he utter a word.

It spoke. 

"So, you have made a decision?" It asked.

"Yes" He replied.

"You do realize that if you do go on this mission and do not succeed, you will lose it all. Don't you?" It asked again.

"Yes" He replied.

“You do not have the necessity to do this" It said.

For the first time, he lifted up his head and looked up at it, into its eyes and said "I insist”

There was a blaze in his eyes.

Then it realized, words lie, eyes don't.

“Everything has a price. If we are to grant you this permission. What is your bargaining power?” It asked again. 

"I will bargain with something that has always been mine and which none can take away from me without my permission, not even death, my heart " His reply seemed as if it was very well thought out.

“A person's heart is his source of power in that place. You will be powerless. What would you do?” It asked.

"I would survive from the power of the hearts of the people I surround myself with" He said.

“In that case, have you chosen well?” It asked.

"I hope so" He said.

Then there was a moment of silence. Then he felt it. A sense of emptiness inside him.
He realized that they had taken away his heart.

"You will have this same feeling till you exist in that place. The only way to have your heart back is to succeed. Remember that” It said.

He stood up and started walking towards the door on his left.

He stood before it and took a deep breath.

"So, what waits me on the other side of the door?" He asked.

"A lot of questions” was the reply from it.

He didn't turn back, but there was a tilt of his head towards the right and he said

"Take good care of it"

And he entered the door.

 

Author's Note

Thank you for your valuable comments.
Follow me on twitter @JDotTheWriter

Reviews

[Writer_next_door]

Ok, so you have an interesting story on your hands. It is fresh and gripping and well thought out it seems. You, however, can add more emotion, I think. To me it lacks an emotion one needs to be totally drawn into the story.
But overall it was well written and I look forward to reading more of it.
Well done, keep it up!

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

You are right Anne.. it lacks emotional connect to it.. Because you don't know yet the full story and at what part this chapter travels in the story... and once you know it... I hope you will be able to emotionally travel with my characters... thanks for the review:)

[Cantharis]

I want more. There is nothing much to say, I loved when he said "I insist", that was powerful.
Though it was too mysterious, personal preference, but I like to know what happens in the thing I read.

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

You will... as it's a book.. I need to take it slow... else the essence would get spoilt... I'll keep posting teasing chapters as such now and then... to keep up your appetite though:P Thank you for the read:)

[R Smith]

has a good edge to it, gives us mystery and imagination to ponder on, he leaves his heart in care till he completes his mission, i guess that's one way to make him hard to beat, it seems you have put a lot into this chapter and now you deserve to get a just reward for your work, well done :)

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thank you so much Rich:) your kind words are as true as your name RICH!!!

[Vanesa Markovic]

Very interesting write up!
-VM

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thanks vanessa:)

[Namrata]

You bargain with your heart ? Days come to that ?
I was so eager to understand what "IT" is but I am so confused just after the line:
"Take good care of it"

Impending irony ?

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

MAYBE:P i wouldn't wanna spoil IT right now... would I? :P

[Mary Bradley]

A bit chilling ... a heart for a bargain ...hmmmm I can't do that :-)
Good read though .

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thanks Mary:) well... everyone have their own choices and decisions to make...

[Saddam]

A good write and read dear friend......................

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thank you dear friend:)