Snippet *1

A short poem with no name

Snippet *1

Surrounded by blurred noise,

Sinking swiftly into the abyss,

Down I fell. My stomach lurched

thrown against my body’s wall.

Upside down I saw the world.

Before coming crashing down.

Reviews

[Faith]

wow, that was fearful...i felt the tension.
the imagery was wonderful (as usual) loll
amazing job.

-Faith♥

[Melissa Kesead]

Brief but it carries a lot of weight. Good job!

[Andrew (not Andy, A.J. ..]

Hmmmm interesting. Quite good.
I like how you do the falling thing. I can see someone turning over and over and falling in my minds eye.
Gj.
Andrew

[Fran Marie]

A brief poem that packs quite a punch, very well expressed and penned!!

[BluesForTheRisingSun]

I think the term "less is more" really applies to this poem. It was short but excellent, hope you'll continue it :)

[EmeraldVenus]

This is good, it reminds me of the feeling on a rollercoaster.

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

Well done. Great Write

[Scott Free]

Wow, nice little 'snippet!'
This had so much meaning crammed into one expressive stanza.
You could probably name it 'Falling' or 'Abyss,' 'Chasm' or something. Just a suggestion.
Sorry I can't offer any criticism. Good job!

[Sheila Kline]

A lot can be read into this......seeing the world with a mirror image....body changing, good becoming bad, so much to ponder within a few lines
Good food for thought!
Sheila

[Legion]

Makes me want to puke. Of course, that is understandable. Well done. You should provide a motion sickness bag (or pill) with this.