The Quest of Lord Evan

A parody in a cascading rhyme -scheme

Lord Evan rode upon his chestnut steed
caparisoned in velvety thru' the wood
in search of where Milady's castle stood.
He urged his charger on to greater speed.
"Had I two wings to fly if but I could,"
Lord Evan speaking to himself did say,
"I would beside her be this very day.
Yea, clasping kiss her as a suitor should.
On! Faster, charger! Fleetly run I pray...
Betake me toward Milady's lips and arms,
Milady's soft and sweetly pliant charms
that we might while the starry night away."

Through forest, field and fen and fertile farm
upon his faithful tired charger's back
Lord Evan rode as blue sky drained night-black.
"I know not her address!" he cried alarmed,
"Methinks I'm effing lost. Alas! Alack!"
(Milady meanwhile effed Earl Nottamun).

Lord Evan then did walk. He walking spun
in circles. Walked. "My effing feet doth bleed!
Perchance an effing motorbike I need...
a Harley'- effing - Davidson.
I'm lost! No effing map to effing read...
Eff me! I've lost an effing shoe!
Eff all this effing &@$!#%! Eff my horse too!
I've effing effed my effing self indeed."

Lord Evan wandered with no effing clue
regarding where the effing castle stood.
Far from Mi-effing-lady's neighborhood
he swore and cursed her, "Eff you, effing shrew!
I effing feel like I'm an effing clown.
Why can't you effing live effing downtown
as all my other effing girlfriends do?
Of all the effing luck... Go eff a duck!
Eff eff eff
Eff eff eff
Eff eff
Phooey!!