Getting through the morning

A hate for mornings

I woke up this morning with the usual feeling of wrongness, as if something is constantly out of place.

I reached out and felt around until I found my glasses, which I'm completely blind without.

I hate it so much - the feeling of helplessness, the dependency on something other than your own self, knowing that you need something in order to survive.

Why is nature so cruel, and why finding the one thing I need takes half my morning away.

I get out of bed and put on the usual torture.

My mood is black, so I grab a black bra, a black shirt and a black skirt.

My mother never did understand why I stick with this color throughout my wardrobe.

I go to the mirror and all I want is to spit at my own face - oh the vanity involved in the morning rituals of looking my best, and for whom?

No one.

I put on my makeup, and I never understand what it is I'm trying to hide.

I always have trouble doing my eyes, because I have to take my glasses off.

It's pretty ironic if you think about it, and I did since I've got nothing better to do.

Why am I wasting my time?

Surely, there's something more productive to do, I just haven't found it yet.

I have a quick breakfast and get on the bus, trying to ignore everyone in my way.

Some old guy is checking me out - oh god, when will this drive end?

I've made it out without killing anyone on the way.

I guess I have more will power in me than I thought.

So now what?

Start the day?

What day?

This is all a waste anyway.

Reviews

[Wisconsin]

I've been there! Except for the whole makeup thing.

And the glasses thing. Actually, it seems the only times I recognize anyone is when I'm not wearing my glasses.

But I can relate to the general feeling of the story. Used to live in an abandoned trailer in the woods. Every day felt futile; not only because it every day was the same, but also because every day something vital to my survival broke down. The handle on my chainsaw snapped off, the bar eventually became scorched and I didn't have the money to fix it, the truck started overheating and frequently left me deserted several miles in the forest away from anybody, the fence was knocked over, cows started dying of unknown causes, and eventually my truck caught fire. Seemed like a new failure every day. Kipple multiplies. Entropy sets in.

Best thing to do is shout "Forward!" to yourself and laugh it off.

/ramble

[DarkAngelWriter]

You would think this would be boyfriend-free, but sweetie, my boyfriend is also blind as a bat without his glasses... damn you, you've done it again!

[d]

third sentence appears to be missing a word unless it was a deliberate omission...

d

[Beautifully Tragic xPoe..]

Thats kind of how I've been feeling lately, being as I'm jobless right now. Doesnt seem to be any point in gettting up, getting dressed.. the usual morning routine. a waste of time..

Great Write, enjoyed this
Rayne