What to Do

What to Do

A Poem by Beka
"

Some times it feels like the world is turning on you. One second everything is perfect and the next everything has taken a complete shift backwards. The only ones you trust disappear. The things that once made smile are what make you cry.

"

You cry yourself to sleep.

You have a bad dream.

You wake up screaming.

Alone.

It's dark.

You cry and reatch out.

There is no one to hold your hand.

You make a phone call.

He doesn't answer.

You knew he wouldn't.

You just want something real to hold on to.

You were.

So happy

Never alone

Constantly Smiling

Now.

There is no such thing

How can you smile?

He doesn't care about you.

You can't even write anymore.

Your floor is littered with papers.

Papers that are polluted with black ink.

Words everywhere.

Mean nothing.

You scream.

Your howls of pain.

Fall on deaf ears.

© 2008 Beka


Author's Note

Beka
I feel like I'm slowly runing out of creative juices again. Sinking into a black hole.

My Review

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Featured Review

When you feel like you're running out of creative juices: keep writing. You can overcome it.
I enjoyed this, because it had such familiar words being used. It's hard to go through heartache, but it's hard to avoid. And the beauty of being a writer, is that we can heal - sometimes - quicker than others, because we write out what we're truly feeling on the inside. Keep writing through the good and bad times.
I liked:
"You cry yourself to sleep
You have a bad dream
You wake up screaming,"

I thought that was good, and something I've experienced. I could relate with this piece. . .

BLFK


Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Sometimes it's best to take a step back and ask your self important things. I really like how you started it! Keep up the writting but ease your self, don't rush a good poem!

Much love n' respect,
Anna

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I did'nt find anything wrong with your poem and i have to agree with BLFK . There is much insperation in sarrow and writting can be the fastest way to healing . The only thing i saw was the font size. Maybe it's just cuase im old and can't see LOL but i thought the font size should have been a bit larger. Otherwise the poem was great !

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is definitely very relatable. The writing is strong and there is good imagery. I think punctuation marks would help solidify the meaning. Without periods and commas the sentences just flow into each other buut, if you add a period after, for example...after Alone//It's dark. Think about it, I just think a lot of powerful phrases and words get lost in the flow. Very good.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

When you feel like you're running out of creative juices: keep writing. You can overcome it.
I enjoyed this, because it had such familiar words being used. It's hard to go through heartache, but it's hard to avoid. And the beauty of being a writer, is that we can heal - sometimes - quicker than others, because we write out what we're truly feeling on the inside. Keep writing through the good and bad times.
I liked:
"You cry yourself to sleep
You have a bad dream
You wake up screaming,"

I thought that was good, and something I've experienced. I could relate with this piece. . .

BLFK


Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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4 Reviews
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Added on June 28, 2008
Last Updated on June 28, 2008

Author

Beka
Beka

Where Ever my mind is most comfortable pretending to be., OK



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