Flash Fiction (200 words)

This is my first attempt at flash fiction. I am not sure how it went... I appreciate any and all comments! Thanks!

A Gathering at the Catholic Church

In a rather odd and remarkably fortunate turn of events, the clouds that had been forecasted to ruin the gathering broke apart just before sunset. The waning sunlight struck the granite facade and bathed it in the perfect warm tones for pictures.

I arrived before everyone, as usual. They all seemed to have an annoying knack for missing the perfect moments. As I stared in awe at the horizon, my heart began to race and my palms began to moisten. My mind shot back 150 miles to my last restroom break.

I darted to my car; praying that I had not forgotten to put it back. I clawed under the driver's seat with breathless anticipation. My hand clasped around the metal cylinder and I breathed a sigh of relief.

The lot had filled around me during my search. Even the truck full of the wood had arrived.

Setup was quick. The logs were staged in the traditional teepee shape, the wooden post stood erect in the center, and she was already in place.

A hush settled over the gatherers as the black clouds rolled back into place. I stepped into position, struck the lighter, and burnt the witch.

Applause erupted.

Author's Note

This is my first attempt at flash fiction. I am not sure how it went... I appreciate any and all comments! Thanks!

Reviews

[Joshua Smit]

wow.... brilliant, the ending was entirely unexpected, yet made perfect sense

[Coyote Poetry]

In a world trying to hide the truth. I could see the church looking for witches to burn. You create a strong story in so few words. I like the complete story. You held my attention till the last word and made me think. A excellent story.
Coyote

[Aisha]

I really like this work of fiction... or is it? (Sorry. Couldn't resist.) Anyway, I like how you dragged it out until the end, surprising the reader. To be honest, I don't really know what flash fiction is, but this was written very well... so take that as you will.

[Jordan]

I like the idea of the modern-day Catholic church burning people at the stake. Were you trying to make a point with that, or just going for the vivid emotions that the idea of contemporary humans acting so barbarically evokes? Coming out at the very end and actually saying that they were burning her kind of killed it, though. I think if you got rid of/re-worded "burnt the witch" it would still be apparent what was going on.