Chapter 1, part 1.

Being as this chapter has something I'd like to call a "flash" To keep it from being too long, I'm breaking this chapter in 2 parts.

1

~Flash~

            Lightning screamed through the black sky, and screams of people echoed through the huge room of fear, and echoed off the perfectly white ash floor. The top of this building was blacker than midnight, and shiny like onyx. Although they weren’t moving, the walls and everything up above had the illusion of movement. They seemed to be crawling with huge, swirling waves.

            People were all standing about in the room, and the group was large. About five-hundred and fifty people were grouped in the room, and there were eleven people in front of the group facing them all. The large group of people, and the front eleven were all dressed in long, black capes. The leader was in the front of the eleven, about two paces in front of the other ten. There were two placed on both sides of the leader were a pace behind him, and were looking around at the large group. Behind those three, eight stood standing still. The leader of the group turned around to face them, and turned to the first one on his far left. After a moment, the man nodded to the leader, and the leader nodded back. They repeated this same gesture up until the leader hit the two beside him, they seemed to be talking, but no words were flowing.

            When looking at them all, the last man on the right seemed to losing his patients. Through the heavy folds of his cape, his fists tightened, and he shook his head slightly and clenched his jaw.

            The leader finally got down to the last man. The last man shook his angrily, and held his hand with two fingers up, and the leader cocked his head.

            “They keep shielding.” The last man said fiercely.

            The leader nodded and walked over to him. As he placed his hand on the mans shoulder, both their heads faced down to the ground. Right then, louder lightning ripped through the room, and the leader took his hand off the other man. Them, and the whole room turned to where the lightning was falling. It finally hit in the back of the room, and many people in the front of the room screamed, and a few in the middle. Farther in the back where it hit though, the people only watched it come down with a roaring crack. Fire flew up to the top as high as the “top” seemed to go. The angry man in the front of the room, stepped forward, and crossed his arms on his chest. Once the fire disappeared, two men in the back slowly rose from the ground. Black hoods covering their faces, and they both got their posture, and looked around the room, seeming angry themselves. A few people in the front started to giggle, but the back only looked at them for a second before turning their attention to the other two near them.

            The taller man of the two, which appeared, stepped forward a bit. “What’s all this about?” He asked the leader with some kind of foreign accent. His voice was hard, and had no patience left in it either, but still held respect for the leader.

            The front man who was the last in the back row behind the leader, looked at him, and then turned to take back his place. The leader slowly started forward, and he raised his hand up to the top of his hood, and pulled it off while walking. The man, probably around sixty, had brown, silver hair. He walked away from the space where the other ten stood. Across the floor, he seemed to fly his way down to the man who called out stood, and when the leader approached him, the man hung his head ashamed.

            “Take your place, Sir.” The leader replied coldly. He looked back at the other man who appeared also, and his dark blue eyes softening knowing the other one was behaving; for the most part. The leader looked back at the man in front of him, placed his hand on him for a moment, and nodded. Then he took it off, pivoted, and hurried to walk back to his place. The man the leader left turned and walked back to his place.

            As the leader walked back to his place, a shorter person looked up at him walking by. His hood fell, and a young blond boy, of about nine got the look of “oops” on his face. The leader looked down at him and smiled, as the boy smiled back, and put his hood back up to rest on his head. The leader finally made it up to his place, and looked about the room.

            The group went from smallest to largest. Being that the nine-year-old was in the first row, it must get older as it went back; or something like that.

            “A week ago, in a mission high in the Keltor Mountains, our Protector of the Amulet was killed. Being that, the Prince of the Wings was hunted down and assassinated also.” With the silence of the room, he lowered his head, and the front half of the group started to get jittery.

            “Knowing the Protector is gone, we must be careful. Whom we meet, where we go, and what we do will predict who will live and die. For without her, our Amulet and everything that makes us who we are today is gone, and until they find another to feed the magic through to us, our organization has no real protection.” He paused shortly. “It may take months, maybe even years, but another one will eventually be chosen. Son or daughter, the clouds will show when. From the looks of it all, it was the work of the Dark Ghosts. Why they would kill the one they chose, no one is sure. It wasn’t the first though, and it probably won’t be the last.”

            In the back area, the two who came in late looked over to one man who was motioning for their attention. They spoke what looked like silent words, then all nodded.

            “Keep an eye out, but please don’t worry, we will take care of all this. When you make it home, do what you would normally do, and live life like you had before all this happened. We will try to have all this taken care of by the next time we meet.” He nodded to them all. “You all are dismissed.”

            It took a second for the last words to register in all their heads. Then the younger kids started to chatter, and roughly made it out of the spots they stood in. As it got closer to the back, things started to get filed out, and organized.

            Once out of the building the two late men walked into the dark gray halls. The man who got their attention met up with them in the halls with someone a couple inches shorter. They stood in a square. The two people who came late were up against the wall. The taller of the two, the one who rudely spoke to the leader was on the left side of his friend on the wall. In front, and to the right was the man who motioned to get their attention, and to his right, his friend.

            “What did you bring us out for Electro?” The taller one spoke, but the way he spoke to the leader sounded worse.

            “Well Falco, My buddy, Psych, told me that your good buddy is going to have some issues. He found out in the beginning of the Masters speech.”

            The taller guy, known now of having the name, Falco, turned to his friend on his right. Who looked up at this, Electro, and quietly asked.

            “What do you mean?” He asked turning his attention to Psych.

            Psych put his head down. Electro looked at some kids passing behind him. They looked up at them with a look of “What are you looking at?” Electro only looked down at them with a cocked head under his cape. The lights in the hallways were bright enough to see their young arrogant faces when they looked up. As the kids were a bit farther down the hall, Electro lowered his head a little more. The kids stumbled over themselves. The one closest to the wall would have completely fallen over if the wall wouldn’t have caught his face first. The other kid looked back at them. His face was completely flushed.

            “Electrocutionist.” He said just loud enough for the older group to hear him. The other young boy got his footing, and looked back at them as his hood fell off. His brown eyes were filled with so much fear; he should have passed out right there. They both took a few steps back, and in the next moment, they were running full-force down the hall.

            Psych was laughing when he lifted his head back up. Electro slowly turned back to the group with an evil grin. Falco had a smile, but his friend had not lost his serious, worried looking face.

            “What do you mean? Tell me!” He repeated, completely lost his patience with Psych.

            Psych looked over at him. “Well, what I see could only happen in a case of something you do within a month or so, and coming from whatever it is you do, or don’t do will cause you your life. Does that make sense? I mean, when what I see takes place, you can still change it, but avoiding it is the best thing.” He only got a confused blank stare back. Psych looked up at electro.

            Electro shook his head, trying to think of what to say. “Listen, depending on what you do within the next month will determine your future. From what Psych saw, it isn’t a good one, or safe, to say the least.”

            “What I am trying to say is, you can always change your future.” Psych added, trying to lighten him up. Falco looked over at his friend, worried he might try something.

            Once he realized Falco was looking at him, he looked down. He seemed to tense up. “Why? What will happen? What can I change?” He looked back up at Psych.

            “I’m not too sure, but in a year or so, and who knows why, but you are with the Protector, and you are running through a forest. It is dark, and you help the Protector up, but once you are up you lost your strength, and the Drial Guards come and shoot you down as you push the Protector out of the way. That is all I got.”

 

Author's Note

Any advice will help, thank you!

Reviews

[Elizabeth M.]

Lightning screamed through the black sky, and screams of people echoed through the huge room of fear, and echoed off the perfectly white ash floor.

I would change either screamed or screams - too repetitive to have both so close together.

Although they weren’t moving, the walls and everything up above had the illusion of movement.

Maybe change to (gave) the illusion of movement to make it more active.

People were all standing about in the room, and the group was large. About five-hundred and fifty people were grouped in the room, and there were eleven people in front of the group facing them all. The large group of people, and the front eleven were all dressed in long, black capes.

A group of about five-hundred and fifty people in the room faced eleven people standing in front of them. Both groups were dressed in long, black capes.

Just some suggestions, hope this helps.
Elizabeth M.