To All The Girls I Loved

The girls I loved were gritty. Gravel Molls

quarried from hard-scrabble fathers wedded

to bedside shotguns: freckled angels

who put out under the stands after the big game

because it wasn't whether you won or lost

but how you played. They didn't care

if you loved them, if your intentions were honorable

or just down and dirty hormonal--

that's how they played. Slippery soles

wise enough to know how to not knock up

a boy, I still remember the ache

of being sucked dry of my innocence,

coming of age almost before I knew how to shave.

Her name? She had one, I won't say

not because I don't kiss and tell 

but she was kind to me then, kinder than

the north wind that blew me ragged

twenty years too late to matter.

What matters is what you don't forget,

the small forbidden things, how much

what you wanted wasn't what you needed then

or now, the one clean thing that stayed itself

when the world shifted beneath you--

a little clarity inside your mixed up world.

Ken e Bujold

Reviews

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

This, to me, personifies the saying, "It is what it is." That's life. No matter our regrets along the way, the past cannot be undone. We look back with favor and regret, but it doesn't change a thing. Life keeps on moving no matter what. I do appreciate the perspective years later. It's like walking through a ghost town.

[Ken e Bujold]

You are spot on Linda

[John the Baptist]

Odd, I don't regret losing my innocence. Rather glad to see it go, actually. Freckled angels, you say? And under the stands? Did that really cause you to ache over anything?

[Ken e Bujold]

physically, not terribly. metaphorically? way more than I ever imagined it might. In the intervening 40+ yrs I have travelled far and wide, and even though I have returned to my home town it isn't home anymore. While we can talk about old times, the present is like being on two entirely different planets by times. we are pleasant but vacant if you get what i mean

[Coyote Poetry]

I don't know Ken. I would do the dances again. Rent better motels.
"what you wanted wasn't what you needed then
or now, the one clean thing that stayed itself
when the world shifted beneath you--
a little clarity inside your mixed up world."
The above lines. All of us must taste. My father gave me not so solid advice. Love many, drink good whiskey and leave, the mean ladies alone. He had six wives and 11 children. A lot of mean wives. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry. Make me think this Tuesday evening.
Coyote

[Ken e Bujold]

well your father's advice about good whiskey and leaving the mean ladies alone is one I would agree with. glad you enjoyed the trip John

[Coyote Poetry]

I did Ken and I appreciate the entertaining poetry.

[Brad Dehler]

Nice work Ken. Yes, "how you played", I think you were well played. It is an interesting challenge to be the lead and to be the one pressing forward. Now you can see it all from the long view, right friend?

[Ken e Bujold]

with age comes perspective. what was so important in my teens 20-30s now more often than not seems of little value. A lot of water under my bridge, and while I wouldn't go back and change the s**t that happened, I do think about it more and more as time goes by. thanks for stopping by Brad

[Brad Dehler]

Absolutely. Interesting to think of it again from a new perspective...

[red93]

Excellent Work Ken and you really made those 'Gravel Molls' come alive - so very precious these Women and their Love - I guess you must have fitted the bill as it were.

[Ken e Bujold]

the Gravel Molls were (are) some of the world's great ladies. Grew up rough and tumble Tony, what I always loved about them, and still do, is there directness.

[willweb]

If only you knew how relatable this poem is for me...not so much the "gritty molls" but the rest of it...we learn lessons when we are young, some of us have the good fortunes to learn from someone experienced. She had a name too that I won't say because of the same reason you didn't. Yep, she was something else. This was really cool Ken, I like the layout, the choppiness and the overall feel of this.

[Ken e Bujold]

glad you enjoyed and related Will. Gravel Molls still among my life's best memories.