Critical

Some write. I spontaneously combust.

This is the truth of the matter:

 

I am unlike you, and for the most part,
you have been blessed.

 

The pen I hold is stainless steel.

 

I sit in an unheated room in the middle of winter
with the window open.  The brown metal chair leans to the left.

I am uncomfortable.  I still sweat.

You don't know this fire.

 

I am not afraid of your critical eye.  I will not shy away
from your comments typed in haste, well-meaning or not.

 

I wake up and spontaneously combust when an image
appears in my head, unwanted and unannounced.

No one can feel the heat but me. 

 

This room is my burn ward.

 

I am both the patient crying out in pain and the doctor
who methodically debrides my wounds.

 

I am engulfed in flames until the images are purged
from my system and the fire extinguished from within.

 

I am not a writer.  I am a burn victim.

These words 

                     grafted skin.

 These hands

                       scar tissue. 

I am disfigured.

I write for as long as I can bear the heat

I cannot sleep or speak or eat

I hold on just long enough to transcribe
my own prescription.

 

I will never heal.

 

 

Reviews

[A.T.B.]

You're making burning sound as if it were a pleasurable experience. And yet, your narrator is giving "writing" a negative connotation in this poem.
I am not a writer. I am a burn victim.
These words are grafted skin; my hands
contracted from scar tissue. I am disfigured.
Do you think writing - no matter how excruciating it might be - disfigures you, or defines you... better?

[MalkavianDelirium]

Wow. Just...Wow.

The imagery is phenomenal, the message sublime. The intensity of it all is dazzling. The creative urge and process is truly different for us all; such personal revelation is a true gift to us.

[Alya Usman]

Ooh... intense. Nice. =) Keep writing.

[Sorry Infamous]

This was...wow.
So raw to read... The images chafe at my skin, each stanza has a different meaning to me. It reads like a broken relationship, with yourself and with all of us. I get trapped in my notebook... you behind your computer screen. I am glad I chose to read this.

[R J Askew]

I like 'I am unlike you' it has so much potential as from difference and friction we get sparks, with luck. It is not always easy to be in the midst of such friction, but it is better than being in a torpor. Personally I like extremes, preferring intellectual ice to burning passion.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

"scar tissue that I wish you saw"...I like that song. And I love this poem. All your work is very good quality writing and I bounced around just picking pieces to read at random. I "paint" with words and I think they are mostly oils; slow drying but it gives me time to shape the intricate details in the picture. I do believe I edit everything a dozen times at one point or another. For every artist, the creative process varies I suppose. I liked this insight into your own process.

[Sean M. Addams]

another well written deep piece.... liked the imagery alot .... thanks for sharing this...

[Ferg]

Wow. This is an excellent poem. Images are intense and feelings match them. Very good writing!