I Flicked a Pick (Now with Audio)

God shave the queen, she's got a lot of heirs...

                 

 

 

 

 

 

I flicked a pick, that pick it stuck

that icky sticky picky f**k

Upon my boot a mucky brute

a wad of yucky fucky gunk.

 

“F**k, that gunk stank!”

“Yuck, that muck stuck!”

 

And even though I kicked and kicked

still that slinky glob it gripped,

that spongy scungy grungy skank

 

it would not leave indeed,

it would not go, and so…

I scraped and stomped and screamed some more:

 

“F**k, that skanky rank chunk!”

“Yuck, that clinging hunk of stink!”

 

Yet still, that gloopy poopy junk

with its haunting taunting clinging

it would not leave indeed,

it would not go, and so…

 

I grabbed a whacking hacking blade

and gave a mighty weighty chop

I made that gremlin go, indeed

I made that gremlin stop,

with its taunting and its haunting

and its gloopy poopy drooping.

 

I sliced it meanly cleanly off

and thanked my common sense a lot.

I nixed that whacky tacky foot

and ganked that punk-arse ball of snot.

 

 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Pryde Foltz]

I love this for two reasons.

1--it is so grotesque and vile as to cross into the humorous and we've all been there even the queen.
2--perhaps unintentionally to pointed out just how savage words can be. And reversely how loving. The topic you have chosen--boogers-- while high on the yuck factor is an unlikely one any reader will hold near and dear to her heart and so you can rip loose, but still the savagery was felt. Words are powerful and can do unintended and intended damage and reversely lift one to new heights.

Anyways this is what I got...lol.

Great write, my new friend.

[L.Edward]

I dig that you mused on it for awhile. That is a compliment within itself. Much appreciated!

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Now this my friend, is utterly, grotesquely, gothic, boysee, adolescent stylee vile!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Though I sure did appreciate your word play, the vulgarity of your indulgence even, a provoking, crafty piece this is, almost like going to a Punk gig as a square-ish middle aged being that I am. actually I did see 'Souxie and the Banchees' in concert, by default in fact, at the Royal festival Hall, London at the Yoko Ono Meltdown festival very recently, yet I felt amazed by the diversity of the audience.....

An interesting piece this is! I shall be back soon to review more.

[L.Edward]

Yes, guilty on all charges. Wow, you picked the Poe influence in it! I'm sure you noticed that there's a bit of Dr Zeussness going on in there too. Sounds like you had fun being disgusted. As the late, great Bill Hicks once said: "growing old, mandatory; growing up, definitely optional.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Ha ha, I laugh, I hope that you are keeping well, take care.

[nihilistictablelamp]

I adore poems that rhyme; They just stand out more for me, and reading them aloud also seems to make the poem more enjoyable. A fun poem. Great!

[L.Edward]

Cheers for the kind words. Yes, as you can tell, I had an absolute ball with this one. Still gets me every time.

[Sami Khalil]

A very funny and whimsical write...

[L.Edward]

Cheers for checking it out. Peace brother!

[Sami Khalil]

Peace and love...You are welcome...:)