Contradiction In Terms

Something goofy I just thought of. Not my finest, but a bit different. May add more later.

 

 

 

 

 

Contradiction In Terms

 

I'm an insomniac with narcolepsy.

I only drink Coke, but I only like Pepsi.

I'm a narcissist who hates the way I look.

I never follow the rules, but I go by the book.

I'm a god-fearing atheist because there are so many.

I fly by the seat of my pants, but I don't wear any.

I'm the never-ending story with a grand finale.

I'm best served chilled, but I'm a hot tamale.

I'm a jack of all trades who'd trade it all for some Jack.

I am standing my tallest when I'm flat on my back.

I'm a contradiction in terms (like military intelligence).

I'd choose one way or the other, but I'm stuck on this fence.

 

Legion

31OCT08

Author's Note

Hey! I was bored alright. :)

Reviews

[J. A. Svercek]

Nicely put. You did a good job of laying out these witticisms without overdoing the...man, I've forgotten the term already--without making the sentences follow the same exact structure (painfully) until it's basically impossible to sit through. Reminds me of "English is a crazy language" (I can't seem to find the author).

Thanks for writing,
J.

[[untitled]]

LoL! I love it. Strange things happen when you are bored and/or sleepy ;) I certainly relate to alot said here. I always say the most random, out-of-the-box writings formulate into great pieces. Thanks for sharing.

[Emily]

I love it. Magnificently done, and a perfect piece for me to come back into the reviewing sector on.

[R J Askew]

'I'm a god fearing atheist because there are so many' is my favourite...please add more, next time you are bored. Nice one.

[Gandré]

hey this I liked a lot. your contradictions which made meaning. just a typo there in the 5th line - atheist. And my favorite line was "I'm a contradiction in terms (like military intelligence)." ha.. great.

[Angel's Lady]

Bravo, bravo! I love this! Like Happy Birthday, oxymorons are my favorite! Positively a wonderfully written, humorous way to start my day. Thank you for writing this. Perfect! Oh, and Happy Halloween.