Chapter 1

Freedom. Two syllables, seven letters. Nothing special at first sight, right? For most people, it is just a simple word. It doesn't say anything to them. How much I wish they could understand its depth... This word is what inspired my parents to name me Heaven. 

Every day, I recall the good old times. The times when I was free. The times when I was waking up to see the sun rising and its rays bathing me, the times when I was running away to gather flowers on the fields in the mornings, feeling the dew underneath my feet, the times when me and my friends used to braid garlands and tried to sell them in the fair, the times when I was coming home starved and my mother made me cheese with sour cream and samp... Dear reader, it may seem like I am just enumerating some childish memories of mine, but these moments were the most beautiful in my life. They were simple, indeed, but the joy I was feeling was something I wanted to last forever. This was freedom to me. This is what it meant when I was a child, living in the land of Serihe. 

The story says that a long time ago, Serihe, along with the lands of Arez, Lofer and Xeram, formed Jinzol. They simbolized the perfect harmony of the elements: Arez was compared with the water, because its wealth allowed the revitalization of the other three after wars; Lofer was likened to earth, because its persistence and endurance in front of danger was the key of Jinzol's resistance; Xeram was compared with the fire, because its desire and determination helped it to achieve a flowering development; Serihe was likened to air, because the people managed to find peace and balance with themselves and others, becoming spiritually free. Even though everything seemed to be peaceful between the four lands, he seed of evil appeared. Abaddon, the ruler of Xeram, wanted to reign over the Jizol. He made a plan in which he put all his faith and unfortunately, it worked as he wished. Abaddon invited the three rulers and the representatives from each power in the lands at a special gathering, under the pretext of celebrating the peace. They didn't know that it was their last day in the living world. During the banquet, Abaddon exited the official salon numerous times, taking advantage of the vulnerability of his guests caused by alcohol. He received news about the military preparations. He was planning to divide his army and send it at the entrances in the other lands. Using fireworks, he could announce them to begin the slaughter.

Near midnight, he revealed his intentions, but it was too late for the guests. Abaddon's guards killed them with no mercy, leaving him the only surviving ruler. That night remained as the bloddiest in the history of the three lands. Abaddon lighted the fireworks and the rumbles were signaling the end of peace. The grounds were soaked in the blood of hundreds of innocent people, the screams of terror filled the air and the magic powers who were bestowed upon them weren't working. The fireworks were made of a special substance called Ginah, which had the properties to block the magic by being touched or drinked. My family managed to escape the carnage, but my friends weren't as lucky as I was. I was just ten years old. I was so young... too young to face such a terror. To see the places and the people who brought happiness in my life being destroyed mercilessly. My home was burnt down, my friends killed, my freedom lost, my life ruined... Everything was gone in that cursed night. 

The next day, a dreadful announcement was spread: Abaddon was the leader over the entire Jizol. This is how his tyranny began. My parents and I tried to start a new life, but it was much more difficult than we imagined. Everything belonged to the new ruler, to promote the class interest, we were subordonated to his wishes, the people wish special needs were always the target of ridicule among the soldiers who were patrolling, the number of prisons increased disturbingly and the sanitary system seemed to worsen. This had been my life for ten years, dear reader. Little food, fright everywhere, little money, but I still found happiness in the poor hut where I was living with my parents. The terror didn't take them away from me. I thought we would leave in our so-called peace for a few more years, but fate is a strange thing, you see? Another cursed night came. I was arrested and imprisoned without having a proper trial. I was just told that I am an enemy of the ruler. That's all. A label can change your life in a matter of seconds. 

This is how I ended in the most secured prison in Jizol: Verkir. Far away from my family, from my freedom, from my chances of making my dreams come true... from everything. I recalled my childhood, the happy moments  that helped me to put my mind at ease, even if it was just for a short time. I told you that some people were blessed with the power of using magic. I am one of them, but the prisons made by Abaddon had something special: the prisoners couldn't use magic between their walls. Only his soldiers could, which made the life here a hell. It felt like being there, it was over. Nothing else mattered anymore. All the hope seemed to be gone forever. 

It's been six months. Six months spent in a large cell, all alone, visited often by the guards to beat me, reminding me 'who was supposed to be submissive'. But, one day, when I was waiting for the soldiers' visit, they brought with them five people, two girls and three boys. They were referred to as 'useless brats'. I could sense that they had part of the same injustice as I did. I have never seen them in my life, but when they arrived in the cell, my soul was embraced by a warm feeling. It felt like through these people, I could find the light in the darkness of chaos. I silently made a promise to myself that I will help them find their peace, the heaven hidden behind the hell. 

Author's Note

Hello everyone! I want to thank you for reading and reviewing my work. You are all amazing :) I hope you will enjoy my new book. Happy reading!
P.S.: Only this chapter is written from a character's perspective. The rest of the story will be in the third person.

~Lyla

Reviews

[Kibbles and Quips]

Hello!

I've just read this one so far, but I figure I'll write my immediate impressions.

First, I like your world building. I get a middle-eastern, sultans of the sand vibe. The names, the lore, all feel believable and that they belong with each other in the same fictional world. So far I am interested in what this world has in store. However, I will say that this seems a bit heavy-handed in exposition to start off a story. Perhaps a more intimate hook would be better to garner attention. Also, I am not wholly sold on beginning with this "note." As a reader, I am left more confused than interested by it being written this way. Why is this prisoner writing this? To what point? What was he or she hoping to achieve? Why would he or she prattle off exposition? On what is he or she writing? Why would he or she have that material available?

They seem like stupid questions, but they are many, and such disrupt the reader's suspense of disbelief.

But, that's just me. And, maybe after I read the rest I'll change my mind, but, as an opener, there should be something more concrete in the mix.

More minor, but still important, there are some mistakes speckled throughout that need to be fixed. Some quick rereads and edits will suffice. Nothing to worry about, to be sure.

Anywho, I look forward to finishing this when I have time. Until then, thanks for sharing! Please keep writing!