News, Soul-life & Verse

This is for Richard, who invited me to try his poetry structure. Taming my experience of this week's violence in verse.

Streaming through the news
Stories that I choose
Based on headlines that entice me
Blocking out the joy
Prey to latest ploy
Led away from what I can be

Love-soul drifts away
So I join the fray
Like so many who are blinded
Armored for this war
Which side am I for?
"Neither one", I am reminded

Now I'm done with rage
Wept onto the page
I am left with sheer surrender
Calling back my soul
Stitching up the hole
I never meant to offend her

Standing in her light
Facing off the night
I will learn her way of loving
Measuring the hate
War will not abate
In unity will freedom ring

Author's Note

Fives 'n Eights (or) Doubledown Style 3, Original form created by Richard W. Jenkin,
© 4 May 1987.
Check out Richard's poetry . . . I couldn't get this week's violence out of my mind, ran the gamut of reactions with a good friend, and then decided to try Richard's form with a very contained expression of my experience of violence in the news. I'm sure I'll be back to free verse just to let the turbulence out, but this was on my mind to try out.

Reviews

[Richard🖌]

Hi, Marianne! : )

I think you've accomplished an exemplary success with this form, whether it is your first or hundredth time, and this serves to impress a point I've always felt is true: If one is a poet, they can take any form and make it their own, for a true poet should be able to compose skillfully in any form, about any topic … certainly more skillfully in some than others, but in any form, nonetheless.

You've faithfully followed the rules for this form, shown good flow and word choices, with easy enough rhymes to follow and grasp the emotion, feelings, and convictions of your heart, mind, and soul. Not a whole lot more could be expected from an artist, than to paint themselves vividly and concisely upon the canvases of their readers' conscious understandings, as you have here.

Remember, too: The manner (form) in which a composition is written is that which separates it from common language — makes it poetry, whether that form may be Free Verse, Free Style, a Sonnet, Villanelle, Quatrain, or one of a proliferance of other poetical forms. The more one learns, practices, and utilizes, the broader, deeper, and more powerful their poetic skills become and the more capable and all-encompassing the poet becomes prepared and able to compose in whatever form is most appropriate for the topic, feeling, moment, emotion, inference, nuance, timbre, etc; in whatever poetic-voice will most powerfully and succinctly get it across to their readers … much in the way there is a best fitting musical note, harmony, score, rhythm, and timing that best conveys that which the musician wishes to express outwardly and creatively from their depths, and what artist would shirk the full array of colors, hues, and textures at their behest to blend upon their palette, to sing upon the canvas?

Not everyone will realize their highest potential, this I well know, but never limit yourself, choke-off your potential, or knock any other form of poetry … everything fits most perfectly something, and if you have that capability to utilize it when needed, desired, and ready … you will have become a master poetess or poet, more fully mature, more fully capable.

Marianne, I haven't appropriate words to convey the depth of feeling you've inspired by giving one of my forms a try, except to say I am humbled and gratified beyond measure by the quality of your excellent effort … bless You for blessing me, and thank you so very much for mentioning my name and crediting my form! ⁓ Richard

[Marianne Rose]

Wow, Richard, I am spellbound not only by your affirmation of my efforts, but also the wonderful metaphors you use to teach me about forms- which I have always resisted fearing they would confine my imagination. I have never thought about poetry forms as a repertoire from which you can choose when most appropriate to the subject matter, tone, emotions, etc., except maybe sonnets for love poems. It makes total sense to me now - I am a folk singer, who has sung musical theatre and pop/ rock, and I'm venturing into blues. One voice, different forms for different reasons. I am a pastel and collage artist who recently asked my husband, an artist, to teach me how to paint. So now, I am a writer, always writing in a form that is most familiar - journals, stories, grants, descriptive pieces for work, procedures- I'm good at these- but I wouldn't try to write a procedure in poetic voice, my Director would kill me! So now, within the writer is a poet, and within the poet is the potential to master as many forms as paints and mixing of paints on a palette. I get it. Resistance melted, I'm open now.

I am so happy that trying your form also provided a gift back to you. I do know how we all long to be seen. And blessed for who we are and what we contribute to this world.

Now it's time for me to play with other forms, and this one again, to see which form is likely best to express which subject matter- unless you already have suggestions or a list of some kind? Otherwise, I'll keep reading and trying different forms and find my way. Thank you so much for your enlightening review!

[Richard🖌]

Marianne,
You are truly a delight!
I'd love to invite you to join my classes, but they are full-up until September.
here's an idea to mull-over: You might consider browsing my poems … many have instructions below them for the form they are composed in, and something may even catch your inspiration, eh(?), like this one did. : )

Anything you need from me, I'm just a shoulder tap away … hugs and happy thanks! ⁓ RJ

[Inject Positivity]

I feel the emotions through this write... Your words always convey some important meaning and they come out from your experience with life, to write what you feel and experience is not an easy thing to do frnd, so I'm glad to be a reader of your soul...

About the form, well Richard sir is an experienced poet and to use his forms so beautifully is an amazing feeling... You did exceptionally well to convey the feelings as well as the form...

Sincerely
Dhiman

[Marianne Rose]

Thank you Dhiman- as I have talked more with Richard I have learned so much about how a poet can write in different forms, even those unfamiliar. Right after this poem, I wrote one on the same topic in my usual way, and felt more able to express what the day was like for me. (Another Day in the USA). But poetry reaches people of diverse backgrounds, perspectives and preferences- what is a preference to me shouldn't eliminate the possibility of reaching people using the same essential message, but a different form. As I read this one more myself, I get used to the form of it and see that the message and emotion is not lost. I'm learning much here on this site- more than I imagined. I always appreciate your reviews, and your work, and feel a kinship here. So thank you for reading and reviewing, and your continued encouragement and insights. All the best, marianne

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you did a really good job of using form...and getting your feelings across in this...
this has been an awful week.
thank you for this poem....

j.

[Marianne Rose]

Thanks J., not my usual style, so I appreciate that feelings came across. I just posted my usual style, a contrast, and personally more cathartic to me, though I don't know what readers would prefer - I guess as many would like one or the other depending on their styles/preferences, right? For now, I just write . . . All I can do.