Eyes of Terror

Short story about a young college couple who go out on a boating trip and what happens to each of them before the trip comes to an abrupt ending.

He circled around and around; water splashing and frothing.  Was he playing games with her?

Mase was gone.  She’d come to grips with this information two days ago.  Now on her third day, drifting out to sea on the life raft, Adelia fought for her own life.

Adelia met Mase Runyon two years earlier; they’d been college freshmen at the time, wet behind the ears and just beginning the adventures of life.  He wanted to seek a degree in marine biology and put it to use as a biological oceanographer.  She wanted to excel as an aquarist having been a certified diver since age twelve.  Salt water was in their blood.

Putting The Serenity into the water, a gift from his grandfather, Mase had hidden an eighteen-karat rose gold solitaire diamond engagement ring on board.  He planned to give Adelia clues to find the treasure and then pop the all-important question.  Unbeknownst to the couple, trouble and terror was lurking in their precious waters.

The young girl, gripping the broken wooden oar in her pruned fingers, eyes wary, smiled at the now-distant memories.  Typewritten clues had been placed methodically around the boat:  in the tackle box, beneath the comfortable captain’s seat cushion and in the life raft.  Each clue directed her to the next until she discovered the sparkling bauble in their sleeping quarters, a symbol of her boyfriend’s love and devotion.

“Adelia Ovaletti, will you marry me?” He had asked on bended knee, trails of perspiration sliding from his dark wavy hairline, tears in his chocolate-brown eyes.

“Yes, yes, Mase, I’ll marry you!”  She remembered screaming and giggling as she threw her arms about his neck.

The next thing she knew, the boat lurched, rocked and began to tip onto its side.  They were thrown to the vessel’s far wall, furniture, pictures and other items crashing over their bodies.

As they tried to scramble to their feet, a massive pair of beady, black eyes emerged through the side of the boat, jagged teeth clicking and gnashing.

Adelia had screamed in panic.  Mase grabbed her waist and thrust himself atop her.  He was yelling something she couldn’t hear nor understand.  Her heart was beating in her ears much too loudly to comprehend words.

Mase’s body was being dragged from her own as she felt the very breath sucked from her lungs.  She would never forget his eyes.  His big, wide chocolate-brown eyes filled with horror, shock and distress.  She could see herself in those eyes; those eyes mirrored her own fear and anguish.

“No!  No!” Adelia had screamed.  She pulled his arm, tugged on his shirt.  She tried to save him but it was to no avail.

“I love you, Adelia.  I love you!” were his last words before he disappeared into the sea’s depths.

He circled around and around; water splashing and frothing.

She saw no land, she saw no rescue forthcoming.  There was nothing but the sea that was supposed to hold the future for her and Mase.

Author's Note

Please give an overall review on this short story. Thank you!

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

The story held the feel of desperation and bad place. I liked how you used the sea. I liked the open ending. I enjoyed the personal thoughts and the good description made the story come alive in vision. Thank you Melissa for sharing the excellent story.
Coyote

[MelissaAndres]

Thank you, Coyote Poetry! I appreciate your kind words.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome Melissa.

[TL Boehm]

Ok, I'm with Sam on this one. You dunked my heart like a donut in a black abyss of coffee and then ATE it. Not nice! Its a great piece of flash fiction though!

[MelissaAndres]

Haha! Thank you, TL! I appreciate you reading and commenting!

[wordman]

poor girl,lost her future husband,didn`t get that ring and she might be dessert

[MelissaAndres]

Thank you for reading and commenting, wordman. I appreciate it! :)

[wordman]

my pleasure melissa

[Samuel Dickens]

Geez, you sure left her in a desperate situation! As her final outcome is up to me, the reader, I'm going to say Mase puts a whuppin' on that shark, comes back to Adelia and the two hang to a piece of wreckage until the current takes them to a tropical island, where they live happily ever after.

[MelissaAndres]

What a romantic you are, Sam! Thank you for reading and commenting! :)