To-Do List of a Million

I’ve always found it very hard to describe how paralyzing anxiety can be, especially after the fact. This is based off a mental to do list I had when I was feeling completely overwhelmed.

to do
only two things
1. make the bed
2. write notes

to do
four things
1. get up
2. make bed
3. find backpack
4. write notes

to do
eight things
1. get up
2. clean off bed
3. pick up sheets
4. make bed
5. find backpack
6. open backpack
7. take out notebook
8. write notes

to do
twenty things
1. get up
2. take a step
3. walk to bed
4. clean off bed
5. pick up sheets
6. put sheets on bed
7. put blankets on bed
8. put pillowcases on pillows
9. breathe
10. find backpack
11. open backpack
12. find notebook
13. carry notebook over to desk
14. find pencil
15. find highlighter
16. open notebook
17. open textbook
18. write notes
19. breathe
20. be happy

to do
a million things
crushing me to the ground
guess i’ll just sit here
trapped behind a wall
of a million imaginary bars
forever

Author's Note

This isn’t really traditional poetry, and quite different from my usual work, I hope you enjoy anyway.

Reviews

[DIVYA]

This poem is such a termedous statement about the Art of Living!
Perhaps, if there are a zillion things to do, we still pick up five or ten and focus on doing them well.
I love the very concept of this poem and the simple, endearing way in which you penned your feelings.

[Em]

Yeah! I definitely agree, i honestly feel like part of being human is having to choose things. Thank you :)

[DIVYA]

You are welcome. :)

[Chris Shaw]

Your post here speaks to me. I may not feel anxiety to the extent you do which appears to be considerable, but what you describe here can often be how my 24 year old grandson has to approach his day. Sometimes he gets completely overwhelmed and can barely attempt anything. It can be completely debilitating. Well done for bringing this illness to the attention of all of us.

Chris

[Em]

Thank you! My favorite part of writing is that other people have experienced or know those who have the same feelings. Definitely makes one feel less alone. Best of luck to your grandson :)