Chapter 1

My eyes were glazed with tears as I sat on the edge of the building, looking down at the innocent mundanes walking the streets, thinking about what had just happened. What I had just saw. What I had just lost. I will get vengeance for her, and if I don't I will die trying. I don't care if he is my father, I don't care if he raised me. I don't care. I might be his son, but Clary was his daughter and he killed her. 

Just… Just killed her without a second thought, like she was nothing to him. He says that we're the same. We are not. We are nothing Alike. He says that we could be the rulers of the world, but without her, I don't want that. I don't want anything but her back here with me. She saved me. She saved my life, over anything else in the world, she chose to save me. What did I do to repay her? I let her die. I let him kill her. I was standing right there, and watched her die. I watched Valentine kill her. Kill his daughter, my sister. He said that she weakened me. 'She causes you distraction,' He had said, 'she is your weakness, if you have a weakness, then you can be beaten, and that is intolerable.'

I had stood there, helpless, and frozen, unable to help the girl I love. I watched her scream in pain, I watched as she bled to death, I watched her lay pale and lifeless on the cold concrete just those two weeks ago. Everyone says I couldn't have done anything, but I know there has to be something I could have done to help her, to save her. I have to have been able to do something, save her somehow. I let her down. I let him kill her. She is gone, because of me, and I will never forget that. She died because I had to become involved with my father, I had to help him, I had to be there, and she cared so much that she tried to save me. She tried to save me, but I was too stubborn and I ended up getting her killed. Damn, I am one sorry excuse of a boyfriend…I should have never even become involved with her. I should have just left. I should have never let her come around her, and get caught up in all of this. I shouldn't have let her get hurt. He will die; I swear I will kill him.

Clary mom hates me even more than she already did…she thinks it's my fault….Simon hates me…He thinks it's my fault…Luke hates me…Because it is my fault that she is dead. It is my entire f*****g fault. I should die too…I don't deserve to live, but I'm alive, and since I'm alive I will kill the a*****e who murdered her.

"Jace," I heard a familiar voice say my name, and I stood and turned to look at him. "Jace we…. We have to find him…. We… We have to…."

I crossed my arms, looking at Simon, who was as dorky looking as usual, except… Now he had kind of a solemn look in his eyes.

"I will kill him, Daylighter, you don't have to worry about that."

He stepped forward. "No… I want… I want to help you…" his voice kind of trailed off, as he thought about Jace and Alec and Isabelle and the rest of the Shadowhunters came back from their fight from Valentine, but Jace had his best friend in his arms, covered in her blood, and she wasn't breathing…

I turned round to walk away, "No, not gonna happen." I said to him.

"Jace, I am coming with you to get him."

"Daylighter, Simon, you're not coming with me. I have to this by myself."

"She was my best friend," He exclaimed, "I loved her, I have to."

I spun around, coming really close to striking him, but stopping myself. "You don't think I f*****g loved her, too? Do you not think that I cared about her? That I miss her? That I care about her? My own damn father killed her in cold blood right in front of my eyes!"

The Daylighter stepped back at fear of being hit, trying to gather the courage to stand up to Jace. He was scary when he was angry, and he was pretty sure that he would get his a*s kicked by Jace. "I am coming with you to kill Valentine, and you are not changing my mind." He said sternly, trying to keep his voice even.

I looked at him, warning in my eyes, "Fine," I told him, "But if you do something to screw this up in any way, I will end you. Don't forget that, Daylighter." I left him standing there in astonishment, and climbed down from the roof.

Simon understood what Jace was telling him, though he didn't understand why the taste of Jace's sweet delicious blood still lingered in his mouth, why he still thought about drinking his blood. Still wished that he could have just one more drop of that blonde, sarcastic, jerk's pure, pure blood… Angel's blood… And he was hoping that he could have just one more taste on their journey to end Valentine.

 

Reviews

[Judy]

This story is good, but I'm a little confused. Clary is his sister and his girlfriend? Also, I think the reading would flow better if you add some contractions (I'm for I am, should've for should have, that sort of thing) I'm not sure why some words are highlighted blue, but I found them distracting. I would be interested to read the next chapter to find out more about the relationships between these people, and maybe some flashbacks for clarity. I hope this helps. I should mention that I haven't published anything so far, so 'm not sure how qualified I am for this.

[A.C]

Thanks for the review. Yes, Jace is technically Clary's sister, but they were also in love. Thanks for the tips.

[Luca]

Hm. I find it a little hard to follow into this. You should start stories right into action, but if you just start without even telling us where we are, it's a little jarring. There are some sentences that you allow to continue, when they would be great on their own. You should describe a little more on some parts, like the death of Cathy and how she died, maybe? Since your main character was obviously observing her death, a little description wouldn't have killed you (pun not intended). Otherwise, great story, I hope you continue to write.