Moon

MOON

Oh! Moon you shine up so bright,

You turn the darkness to light,

You are very far away from my sight,

You show yourself only at night.

You are surrounded by tiny little stars,

You appear very appealing to my eyes.

In the dark hours of night you rise,

You are sometimes crescent,

You make me surprise.

Adoring you all night my time flies.

Reviews

[ElizaB]

Thank you for entering.

I really like this, You speak so lovingly and almost romantically to the moon.

Tonight is the super moon! Have a look if you can, I am sure such beauty will inspire.

[Najam Us Saher]

I missed beholding the sight yesterday. I thank you so much for creating such contests on which I have a poem to submit. I love your contests :)

[Anjali]

It's so sweet and beautiful.

[Najam Us Saher]

Thank you so much ☺

[SZHZIA]

A very beautiful poem and I also call it a song that you composed it your little sister whom you personified with the moon. I have read many poems on the moon in which most of poet compared it with the beauty of his beloved. If you have seen your sister as the moon it is interesting. I guess, if she is a lovely moon, the other members are stars for her. A nice job and a great gift that you have presented to your little sister. Thanks for sharing it. Keep writing.

BEst
szhzia

[Najam Us Saher]

Oh thank you I liked the way you have given your views regarding comparing her with moon and stars.

[SZHZIA]

It was my pleasure, Najam and you are welcome as always. Keep writing :)

[Njeri Brooks]

The only thing I think this poem could've really used is more description. I mean, it's blatant that you like to look at the moon, but you should entice the reader to also look at the moon from your perspective.

Extra descriptors would do well in articulating how you feel.

Overall, I like how you wrote about something in nature you really have a lot of adoration for.

[Najam Us Saher]

I wrote this for my sister she wanted to submit it for school work as she is very young I wrote in a way young kids would do and there was a limit for the sentences.

[Njeri Brooks]

Ah, ok. That makes sense. You should check out "Resa's Remnants". It's based on the idea of familial love.

[Najam Us Saher]

Yeah I've read it and it was very heart touching poem

[Njeri Brooks]

Aww, thank you!