An actor's life for me

Small, lighthearted slice-of-life piece on the emotions of an actor.

You've practiced for weeks for this night. And now you're backstage, hands wringing, heart in your mouth, feeling like you're going to throw up. What if you come on late? What if your costume has a big hole in the behind that you didn't notice? What if you get out there and completely forget EVERYTHING?

It started with the audition. You spent days agonizing over the perfect monolouge, perfect outfit that would give a "suggestion" of your character without being a costume. You shook hands with the casting director and tried, tried oh so hard not to let them know how badly you wanted this. 

You filled out the form that they give you. What if you haven't had enough experience? What if they absolutely needed someone who will be availiable on Tuesday evenings when you had your dance class?

You stiffly marched up onto the bare stage and did your piece. Your voice echoed strangely in the desolate auditorium, sounding small and alone. You stumbled away and prayed that you hadn't messed up too badly, that someone would have pity on you.

The call came a week later. You have the part! First came shock, followed quickly by euphoria with anxiety racing on its heels. You knew it would be a lot of work.

The first  read-through. You winced every time you stumbled over your lines. You stared at the sheer number of words you had to have memorized and felt like screaming, running, pounding your head against the wall.

Rehersal after rehersal after rehersal. You ate and drank blocking. You breathed lines instead of oxygen. Your dreams were all filled with alternate ways to develop your character. Real world? What real world? This play was your everything.

You laughed at the dress rehersal in your strangely-shaped, bubble-gum-colored costume. Who in their right mind would ever wear this? Every mishap and pratfall is hilarious. A bad dress rehersal means a good opening night, right?

"Places, Act One!"

You step out onto the dark stage and force yourself to stop biting your nails. You gingerly sit down in the chair and poise with the book in front of your nose, waiting. You hear the director give her "this-is-a-wonderful-play-you'll-love-it-sit-down-turn-off-cell-phones" speech. There's an itch on the side of your face. Is there time to scratch it? What if you ruin your make up? What-

No more time. The curtain goes up. Blinding lights hit you full in the face and you blink frantically, trying to recall vision.

It starts. You feel as if you're in some sort of alternate reality. Have you said that line already? Was that last gesture too big? Too small? Should you be louder?

The person next to you has stopped talking and is looking at you expectantly. But you know you're not supposed to talk yet, because you talk after the next line, which will be coming up any minute now...

Nothing.

S**t.

S**t.

S**T!

They've missed their cue! They've forgotton their line! Everyone freezes. The silence streaches on and on into eternity broken only by terrified, frantic glances among you people marooned on the stage and everyone's watching, watching, and they can surely see that something is wrong and soon...

Wait. What's this? Your lips are moving. Sound is coming out. Words are flying out and fastening themselves in the air in front of you, as if they were meant to be there, as if they were written. The other actors look at you dazedly. You prattle on, talking about who-knows-what. How long can you keep this up? You know it will get old soon.

That man. That little old man who always sat in the back and slumped over his script every free second...he's talking. He's helping you out, smiling. Thank the Universe for that man. People are laughing in the audience. It takes a moment for you to realize that they think your lines are funny, that they liked your improvized monolouge.

The dropped cue is picked up again. The show goes on....and you can do know wrong. Stage fright? Hah! Every hand movement, every facial expression, every inflection is perfectly calculated for maximum impact. You're flying. You are king.

Applause. You grin so hard you're sure your cheeks are splitting open. People are hooting and clapping and stamping. They love it. They love you. You bow again and again.

You float off stage and into your director's grateful arms. She hugs you and repeats her thanks for saving the show as the rest of the cast pats you on the back and makes plans to go out to an Applebee's cast party.

And as you pull off your sweat-soaked costume and hang it up carefully, you are absolutely sure, without a doubt, that this is what you want to do with your life. It's wonderful. It's glorious. You feel as if you could get up on a chair and sing opera, shout your joy to the world.

This, THIS, is acting.

Reviews

[Vesa Lee]

I -really- like this.
It was so inspiring and theatrical in style that I think it'd be amazing if spoken.
Like a monologue.
On a stage.
With an audience. ^-^
Really though, as a reader I got caught up in all the emotions and feelings that were flying about from sentence to sentence.
I felt the joy and the fear.
Wonderfully done.
This was a great piece. *smile*

[Nodamselami]

Wow, thank you!

I apologize for typos. Spell check has sharpened its swords and declared war against me.

[Twilight]

Firstly, I shared this piece with a few of my fine friends (including Vesa), because I thought that it might appeal to them. It is rather original, and probably better than the writer realises. Indeed, whilst it might be written in a light-hearted way (or including a few amusing comments), that does not weaken the strength of this piece. Furthermore, a lot of the observations which Nodamselami has made, are actually perfectly true. Even though, it may be hard for some readers to believe what she has emphasised.

I used to have a friend who works in the theatre, and some of her experiences or comments support what Nodamselami has observed. From what I have seen of this writer's work, it could be her best (so far). Also, each of her submissions, seems so refreshingly different. Indeed, I never know which theme, she is likely to use next!

Thankyou, for adding this to my Group, "Twilight's Disciples". Somehow, you have managed to describe the very essence of acting, in just a few paragraphs. Keep reading, writing AND sharing! Who will be next, to add their writing to this Group, I wonder?