I burned the catcher in the rye

I apologize. I can't justify enough the sad mental condition in which I wrote this..

I received a copy of the book at the age of 15 when I was 10 years old.
The thing I remember most, besides the drab red cover, was the way my 9^th grade teacher thrust it into my hands as if to say ‘Here! Take it! Please ..It’s cursed!’ or perhaps ‘You’re in big trouble .. this is your punishment!’
I wasn’t interested in taking it. The dull silver title and lack of appealing graphics made me sick. It looked as if the non-jazzy 1950’s had thrown up into my hands. My sister had read it. My brother had read it. My father had even read it. Now it was my turn. 

I was at the back of the bus and the McCarthy twins were shooting spitballs across the seats at each other and Henry Valentine was persuading the sub bus driver to take a detour into his cousin’s driveway to score some marijuana. I slowly dusted off the old cover of the book and pulled open the first page. Big mistake! There was a warning in the form of a giant claw which lunged out and grabbed me by the throat and made me swear never to read it’s contents for within the walls of these pages were the contents of mythological demonic sacrificial secrecy and the recipe for disaster and plague war. I had to admit.. I was finally intrigued. When I got off at my stop a ferocious windstorm scooped the book out of my hands. Pages flew in every direction. I chased it down back alleys and held my backpack full of year old sandwich meat and Algebra Text over my head to shelter from the acid rain and angry lightning. It was the apocalypse the demon hand had warned about. I had to save that book. I wasn’t sure why. Afterall my father had read it when he was about 5 years old in 1904. Back when reading a book was as seductive as getting a handjob from a narcissistic middle-aged woman in black leather. As I gained on the book behind the old abandoned cinema, I vaguely noticed in the corner of my eye two undercover lizards with black top hats and ray-guns watching me. They must have been new to the neighbourhood. I didn’t like them. Finally as the book stopped in a boiling puddle I grabbed it and threw it in my bag and raced home. The undercover lizards were gaining on me. The lightning zapped a giant oak tree down in front of me. I jumped over it and felt a ray of light burn a hole in my shoulder and I screamed for this all to end when I tripped over a stray cat and flew into the air. My backpack whipped open and the sacred novel tumbled out. I was cut and bleeding and missing a tooth and soaked to the bone, but I remembered the prophecy of the demon hand. My head began to feel light and I spun around and around and the last thing I remember seeing was the two ugly lizard spies laughing over me hysterically. 

When I came to I was in a candle-lit room in what looked like a hospital bed. I slowly raised my aching head and looked around. This was it. I’d sure done it. I’d forsaken the demon hand’s prophecy and defied the sacred oath, now I was stuck in a home for the criminally insane. All because I chose to read a sentence of a book which, as far as I knew, was the worst piece of garbage on earth. Or maybe because I’d disregarded it? This was my punishment for losing a tooth escaping from demented lizard warriors of the realm of ridiculousness. My father had read it, my sister had read it, and my brother had written a report on it’s significance. I began to break down and cry when suddenly a portal of light shone down from the roof and that dreaded book dropped to my bed. I stared at it angrily, the cursed thing, had not a scratch on it. I grabbed a bucket from the medical supply room and pulled out my matches and smiled for the first time all day. I burned 'The Catcher In The Rye'.

Reviews

[Amayrani Franco]

I love everything about this... As much as I enjoyed reading Catcher in the Rye, I feel as though it often gets far too much credit just for having been controversial in its time. Everyone is pushed to read it at the first hint of teen angst, or if while young you mention an interest in writing- If we box people into these expectations how are we supposed to grow as readers and writers?

[Richard]

Yes exactly :)
and thank you for getting something out of this and for the thoughtful review :)

[Nia Hope]

Lol I like this I read the book too and didn't like it much but not to the point where I wanted to burn it. Great write and rather adventurous for a wild book chase :)

[Richard]

haha thank you very much I was hoping it would be a short burst of adventure ...
I actually read the book a few times over the years and it's one of my favorites ... I was just having fun with the idea ha

[Nia Hope]

I had fun with your idea too :)

[Richard]

hah thank you :)

[Elizabeth]

At the age of 15 when you were 10... must be a typo. Or a joke that went over my head. But then ... I see that dad read it when he was 5. I think I get it. It's one of those "up hill both ways" things. Clever. Damn book! You should read it at some point, though. :P

[Richard]

up hill both ways is a really good expression and I like it a lot ... I think yeah, it's kind of I write a lot with non-sequiturs things like "jesus rides beside me but never buys any smokes" sort of doesn't make sense ... but and wordplay and stuff ...
ohh it is good I have read it :)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

haha Burning the "Catcher in the Rye". Interesting idea..I rather liked this story. There were a lot of great descriptions, and you ran through the corridors of reality and the surreal rather feverishly, which left me feeling intensely connected as I read. I had to know what was going to happen.

I have questions...the first line threw me a little "I recieved a copy of the book at the age of 15 when I was 10 years old"--are you saying that you were 15 but acted more like a 10 year old? I'm not sure. I also feel as though you are making a larger metaphorical reference to the book than just the fact that it is a slightly daunting read, but I can't quite place it.

Overall, I was completely entertained while I read this. Intriguing indeed.