The Dumping

I met Sally tonight and she’s really down.

Who’s Sally.

Sally, the girl you dumped last month.

Do believe that was by mutual consent.

Anyway, I told her you would meet her in the bar tomorrow night, where she will dump you in front of all her friends, hence building up her self-esteem.

Yeah, no problem, I’m going to the football tomorrow, it’s on the way.

You would just go into a bar and get dumped and ridiculed.

If it builds up your friends self-esteem, no problem.

This will be in front of all her friends, and that doesn’t bother you.

Why would it bother me, it’s not like we’re together.

You really amaze me at times.

I know, just a regular good guy.

You do know she’s going to humiliate you.

I’ll take it like a man.

You would just let that b***h humiliate you in front of everybody. You sure you don’t still have feelings for her.

Okay, something just happened there. She's gone from best friend, to b***h. Did I miss something.

Yes, you did. No one in their right mind would walk into a bar to get dumped.

Have I moved into the twilight zone here. It’s not real the dumping. I’m doing your sort of best friend a favour. Or at least I thought I was. Are you on drugs or something.

Don’t try and turn this on me. No guy in his right mind would do what you're doing.

Let me rewind here. I’m watching the football. You come in and give me this scenario. I agree with it. Now I’m a nutjob.

Of Course, you're a nutjob, no guy in his right mind would agree to do what you're doing,

I can see why your last boyfriend joined the priesthood.

He didn’t join the priesthood because of me. He got the call.

Sort of wishing I got the call too.

That’s it, see tomorrow when Sally dumps you. I’m going to be beside her, and I'm going to dump you too.

So I’m going to a pretend dumping, a real dumping, the football. Does it get any better. Someday i’m going to understand women. Though by that time, I’ll probably be declared insane.